Mutant whistle-carving elf

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Mutant whistle-carving elf
Monster ID 750
Locations The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory
Hit Points Scales with player stats
Attack Scales with player stats
Defense Scales with player stats
Initiative 100
Meat None
Phylum elf
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts arm, head, leg, torso
Drops
elven limbos gingerbread, elven whittling knife
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
mutant whistle-carving elf You're fighting a mutant whistle-carving elf

This is an elf who used to be in charge of carving all of the wooden whistles for good little girls and boys, because nothing thrills the soul of a child like a wooden whistle.

Anyway, since his exposure to Grimacite radiation, he hasn't been carving many whistles, or wetting any whistles, either. Now he's just a big, hulking monster with a knife. And that's the very best kind!

Hit Message(s):

He slashes you with his knife. Well, at least he didn't use his claws. Ugh! Ouch! Argh!

He slashes you with his claws. Well, at least he didn't use his knife.Ugh! Ooh! Ouch! Eek! Ugh!

He jams a whistle up your nose. Well, at least it'll be easier to call taxis now. Wait, what's a taxi?Ouch! Argh! Eek!

He blows a whistle really loud, right in your ear. You collapse as you flash back to high school gym class.

Critical Hit Message:

He jams a whistle into your lungs, so your last breaths are particularly noisy. Wait, that's too gruesome for our game. He, er, ties your shoelaces together! Hilarious! Oof! Ow! Ow! Ow! Oof! Ouch! Argh! Ugh! Ow!

Miss Message(s):

He tries to blow the whistle on you, but you find an emergency whistlestop in the corner.

He tries to slash you with his claws, but you put a bucket on your head and dodge.

He tries to slash you with his knife, but you pull out a gun. That's the Loathing way!

He tries to shove a whistle where the sun don't shine, but can't find you tan lines.

Fumble Message:

He plays a brief snippet of classical music on his whistle, tragically showcasing the mind that used to be before the radiation destroyed it. Happy Crimbo, I guess. (FUMBLE!)


After Combat

Limboswafer.gifYou acquire an item: elven limbos gingerbread (15% chance)*
Shineknife.gifYou acquire an item: elven whittling knife (? chance)*
Upon reciting The Spirit of Crimbo
Crabclaw.gifYou acquire an item: twitching claw (100% chance)*
or
Vial.gifYou acquire an item: unstable DNA (100% chance)*

Occurred at The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory.

Notes

References

  • The hit message about the gruesome noise may be a reference to gory film Cabin Fever, in which one character has a harmonica smashed into his throat.
  • The message about the Loathing way is a reference to the movie The Untouchables. "You wanna get Capone? Here's how you get him. He pulls a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue! That's the Chicago way, and that's how you get Capone!"