Cheerless mime functionary
|Cheerless mime functionary|
|Locations||The Cheerless Spire (Level 1)|
|Hit Points||75% of Player's Defense|
|Attack||Player's Moxie + 1|
|Defense||Player's Muscle + 1|
|Monster Parts||arms, head, legs, torso|
Near the empty space that passes for this office's water cooler, you attract the unwanted attention of a mime functionary.
One of the office mimes notices you and starts making menacing gestures in your direction. You stagger backwards under the force of an imaginary shove.
He rears his arm back and pretends to throw a stapler at you. Your <thigh> starts bleeding. Ooh! Ouch! Ouch! Ow! Ouch!
He mimes a gesture you don't understand until you get a papercut on your <leg>. Argh! Ouch! Oof! Argh! Ugh!
He mimes the act of twisting your <leg>, and pain erupts inside of it. (CRITICAL HIT!)
He rears his arm back and pretends to throw a stapler at you, but you duck out of the way of where the stapler isn't.
He mimes a gesture you don't understand, and what you don't understand can't give you a papercut. Like they say.
He mimes the act of twisting your <knee>, but you move it out of the way of... his imagination. (FUMBLE!)
|You acquire 3 crystalline cheer|
|You gain x Fortitude.|
You gain x Mysteriousness.
You gain x Chutzpah.
Occurs at The Cheerless Spire (Level 1).