Chauvinist Pig

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Chauvinist Pig

What's happening, toots?
I will wink and smile at you
make me a sammich.

Increases Meat drops and stats after combat

Ability: Has the properties of both a Leprechaun and a Blood-Faced Volleyball.

Throne/Bjorn: +2 Muscle Stat(s) Per Fight, sometimes deals 15-20 Sleaze Damage

Hatchling: Hungopig.gif hungover chauvinist pig

Familiar-Specific Equipment: Bodyspray.gif bottle of Cochon Noir

Arena.gif Ultimate Cage Match Scavenger Hunt Obstacle Course Hide and Seek
Hardcorex.gif Olive.gifOlive.gifOlive.gif Olive.gifOlive.gif Olive.gif

Mumming Trunk Abilities:

+15% Meat Drop 4-5 MP +4 Muscle statgain +15% Item Drop +4 Mysticality statgain 8-10 HP +4 Moxie statgain
Hardcorex.gif Hardcorex.gif Hardcorex.gif Hardcorex.gif Hardcorex.gif Hardcorex.gif Hardcorex.gif
*Hover for details
Dasboot.gifCannot breathe underwater
Combat Messages
  • Regular messages:
<name> gives you a lascivious wink, a lecherous grin, and says, "hey, hot shtuff, why don'tcha iron some shirts for me?"
<name> grins, says, "hey, toots, why don'tcha get me another beer?" and winks drunkenly.
<name> says, "I'm not sexisht; every chick I know has got at leasht two redeeming qualities, if you know what I mean!" he grins and winks at you, as you turn away in disgust.
<name> says, "I'm not sexisht; I think chicksh and broadsh are better than guys at lotsh of things: laundry, dishes . . ." he grins and winks as you roll your eyes.
<name> says, "I've got your wink and your smile right here!" You decline to look where he's grabbing.
<name> smacks you on the butt. When you spin around, outraged, he gives you a lewd grin and a downright obscene wink.
<name> tells an offensive joke about a dishwasher breaking down. He winks and grins at the punchline, but you try not to encourage him.
<name> tells you a pretty offensive joke -- let's just say the punchline is, "there's a clock on the stove." He winks and grins as he finishes the joke, and you try not to encourage him.
  • Enthroned in the Crown of Thrones:
    <name> shotguns a beer and shouts some particularly lewd pick-up lines at your opponent, offending its sensibilities (and senses) for X damage.
  • Bjornified in the Buddy Bjorn:
    <name> pops up over your shoulder and drunkenly shouts something at your opponent. You can't quite understand him from the slurring, but juding from the X damage he took, your opponent got the gist.
  • With lucky Tam O'Shanter equipped:
    <name> makes an offensive, if not obscene, gesture beneath the Tam O'Shanter.
  • With miniature gravy-covered maypole equipped:
    <name> pelvic-thrusts his way around the Maypole.
  • With wax lips equipped:
    <name> smiles lasciviously with his real lips, and artificially with the Wax Lips.

Arena Messages

  • When entered in the Ultimate Cage Match:
    Chauvinist Pigs aren't fighters; they're lovers. Know what I mean, sugartits?


  • The familiar messages will appear before meat drops (if there are any) and stat gains. The same message may be displayed twice.
  • The familiar messages do not appear to differ based on your gender.


  • "There's a clock on the stove." is the punchline to the joke, "Why don't women need watches?".
  • The "offensive joke about a dishwasher breaking down" is this: "What do you do if your dishwasher breaks down? Kick the b****!".
  • The use of "sugartits" in the Ultimate Cage Match message may be a reference to a comment that Mel Gibson made to a female police officer during his 2006 DUI arrest.