Zombie Homeowners' Association (Hard Mode)
|Zombie Homeowners' Association|
|Hit Points||5,000,000 to 30,000,000|
You step into the large central chamber of city hall. You peer into the darkness, and in that darkness a pair of eyes opens. Then, near it, another pair. And another, and another, until your own eyes finally adjust to the light and you see an abominable heap of well-dressed zombies, all connected by various bits of their anatomy to all of the others.
The largest one, the one at the top of the heap, begins to moan, the sound thick and wet.
"Don't... you mean... brains?" you reply.
"Weeds." she continues. "No more than... Niiiiiine inches. 90 contiguous squaaaaare feet. Fiiiiiiire hazard."
Great. Just what you need. A bunch of petty bureaucrats led by a nosy chairwoman.
As the mass approaches you, the chairwoman sees your skirt and flies into an apoplectic rage. The zombies beneath her quiver and snarl.
One of the zombies hits you in the head with a rusty lawn ornament that was confiscated from its owner for being too racy. Ooh! Oof! Ugh! (sleaze damage)
One of the zombies beats you with a pair of confiscated pink flamingoes. Being plastic, they aren't very heavy, but they are pointy. Ouch! Eek! Eek!
"Currrrrtaaaaiiins! Yoooouuu!" one of the zombies moans at you. "Are... are you trying to say 'It's curtains for you'?" you ask. "Nooo! Your winnndooows baaad! Get new currrrtaaaaiiinss!" Then it bites you. Argh! Ooh! Oof!
One of the zombies hits you with part of a swingset. "Too taaaaaall. Tooooo taaaaalllll." he says. "'It's not even my swingset!" you counter, to no avail. Eek! Oof! Oof!
The zombie lady on top of the heap tries to yell at you about something you've done wrong, but all that comes out is a geyser of foul-smelling fluid, which is way, way worse than a lecture about civic responsibility. Ugh! Ooh! Ugh! (stench damage)
One of the zombies slices open your thigh with a rusty lawnmower blade. "Graaarh," he says. "Was that so hard?" Ugh! Ouch! Ugh!
Two of the zombies grab your wrists, and two more grab your ankles. It's come down to this -- being drawn and quartered by bureaucrats. (CRITICAL HIT!) Eek! Ugh! Eek!
The heap tries to attack you, but gets distracted by a report about a flowerbed overlapping a sidewalk by half an inch somewhere in the village.
"Look!" you shout, pointing behind the zombies. "An unregistered yard sale!" They turn around, howling and gnashing their teeth.
The zombies seem to want to attack you, but it takes them some time to sort out the necessary paperwork.
The zombie lady on top of the heap demands that you mow your lawn, but you defiantly refuse. Way to go, Rosa Parks.
The zombie lady at the top of the heap yells at the lower zombies to move toward you, but they misunderstand and move sideways, instead.
The heap lurches toward you, but you distract it by pointing to a cluster of weeds growing through a crack in the floor.
The zombies try to figure out the best way to attack you, but end up spending an hour arguing about procedural details and don't manage to accomplish anything. (FUMBLE!)
The chairwoman grabs some parts from the zombies that surround her and rebuilds her body.
With a final lurch, one of the zombies hurls a bag of weed killer at your skirt, dissolving it instantly.
|An item drops: zombie mariachi hat|
|An item drops: zombie accordion|
|An item drops: zombie mariachi pants|
|An item drops: HOA regulation book|
|An item drops: HOA zombie eyes|
|An item drops: HOA citation pad|
|An item drops: 1-4 wriggling severed nose|
|You acquire a clan trophy:||Meddling Finger|
|You gain ??? <substat>.|
- This monster cannot be copied.
- Immune to all stunning.
- To fight the Zombie Homeowners' Assocation in hard mode, you need to wear a weedy skirt into the fight. The weedy skirt is destroyed if (and only if) you win the fight, with this message:
- With a final lurch, one of the zombies hurls a bag of weed killer at your skirt, dissolving it instantly.
- Damage that is not from a group damage source causes the ZHA to heal itself immediately.
- Additional damage from a Rain-Doh green lantern on top of a group damage spell does not cause the healing to occur.
- Stats at 1 kiss: 700 attack, 700 defense, 5 million HP, 75x Splattersmash multiplier, +200% initiative
- Stats at 2 kisses: 900 attack, 900 defense, 10 million HP, 68x Splattersmash multiplier, +250% initiative
- Stats at 5 kisses: 1500 attack, 1500 defense, 25 million HP, 45x Splattersmash multiplier, +200% initiative.
- Stats at 6 kisses: 1700 attack, 1700 defense, 30 million HP, 38x Splattersmash multiplier.
- The ZHA seems to take less damage from all sources at higher kiss levels
- The ZHA has a hard damage cap at 2.5 million
- The number of wriggling severed noses depends on the total number of kisses across all zones of the Dreadsylvania instance as with the regular boss. You get one additional consumable for killing the boss in Hard Mode.
- Will drop a second hard-mode-exclusive loot if a total of ~18 000 kisses have been earned in this dungeon before fighting him.
- Remove all Passive Damage before the fight. Do not use an attacking familiar.
- The hard part about this fight is the huge number of HP this boss has: 5 million times the number of kisses per fight the zone has. To put this in perspective, a character with 4500 mysticality, +1000% spell damage, and a Rain-Doh green lantern will only deal about 300k a round with Saucegeyser, before applying the ZHA's damage reduction. Above 1 kiss, you may need to try something else. There are at least 3 ways to do it:
- The current most popular strategy is to buff muscle as high as possible and use Splattersmash. It deals damage with a very high multiplier, and on someone with enough muscle will efficiently chew through the ZHA.
- Another strategy is using clusterbombs, which do large amounts of damage based off buffed mainstat. However, depending on the price or availability of clusters and fuses, this can be very expensive.
- Raising mysticality and spell damage, and casting Saucegeyser, can also work. Very high-level characters may be able to overpower the boss with high stats. Garbage Nova, if you have it, is actually better than Saucegeyser.
- With any of these strategies, a shard of double-ice is recommended (With garbage nova and Rain-Doh green lantern, ingot turtle will be much more helpful). Hot and spooky damage will be doubled. Also, a V for Vivala mask will increase both your muscle and your combat item damage, which helps the first two strategies.