Voyeuristic artist

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Voyeuristic artist
Monster ID 590
Locations The Rogue Windmill
Hit Points Scales with player stats
Attack Scales with player stats (Max 125)
Defense Scales with player stats
Initiative 50
Meat None
Phylum dude
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts head, arm, leg, strings
Bohemian rhapsody
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
voyeuristic artist You're fighting a voyeuristic artist

This little guy is too brittle (and, let's face it, far too creepy) to join in the shenanigans and goings-on at the Rogue Windmill. Since he can't play, he sits in the corner, taking it all in and making paintings of what he sees. He doesn't make much meat selling the paintings to the Rogue Windmill's patrons, but he makes a decent living by not selling them to the spouses and lovers of the Rogue Windmill's patrons.

Hit Message(s):

He does a quick sketch of you, exaggerating all your flaws. It really hurts your feelings. Argh! Ow! Ow!

He smacks you with one of his canes, sugar. Ow! Oof! Ow!

He does a quick sketch of you getting your ass kicked. It's so realistic you feel bruised. Eek! Argh! Argh!

He tells you a long story, made longer by his stutter and less coherent by his lisp. You chew the inside of your cheek to stay awake. Argh! Ooh! Argh!

Critical Hit Message:

He walks toward you, but trips and goes sprawling. Just as you think you're safe, though, and unconscious Argentinean falls through the ceiling and squashes you flat. Man, what a weird place this is. Ow! Ugh! Oof!

Miss Message(s):

He tries to cane you, but it doesn't work since your name's not Michael.

He does a caricature of you. You both share a good laugh.

He does a quick sketch of you getting your ass kicked, but you still can't picture it.

He shows you some of the pictures he's done of the can-can dancers. Niiiice.

Fumble Message:

He delivers some heartfelt speech about beauty, truth, and love. You tell him that, generally, you can only get two out of three of those on a good day, and he gets too depressed to attack. (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Music2.gifYou acquire an item: Bohemian rhapsody (20% chance)*
You gain some <substat>.

Occurs at The Rogue Windmill.


  • This encounter is based on the artist Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec, who frequented Moulin Rouge and made various famous paintings of it during his lifetime. Toulouse-Lautrec was only five feet tall at maturity, which is mirrored by the the voyeuristic artist's small stature. Other references in the fight refer to the portrayal of Lautrec in the film Moulin Rouge!
  • The miss message "It doesn't work, since your name's not Michael" refers to either Michael Caine, an English actor famous for starring in films such as Alfie and The Cider House Rules, or Michael P. Fay, an American who was caned in Singapore on May 5, 1994, for theft and vandalism.