Turtle Tamer

"TT" redirects here. Did you mean the Traveling Trader?

Description

• (Male) The Turtle Tamer's mystical connection with his terrapin brethren imbues him with great power. He excels at moving very slowly and winning footraces with smug satisfaction. His Muscle is the key to his success, and to his long lifespan.
• (Female) The Turtle Tamer's mystical connection with her terrapin sisters imbues her with great power. She excels at moving very slowly and winning footraces with smug satisfaction. Her Muscle is the key to her success, and to her long lifespan.

Skills

Most Turtle Tamer skills are learned from The Brotherhood of the Smackdown. All Turtle Tamers begin the game with Patience of the Tortoise and Toss.

Level	Skill	Description	Effect	Type	MP Cost	Train Cost
0	Patience of the Tortoise	By reflecting on the nature of the Tortoise, you can gain temporary enlightenment. Your Strengthliness and maximum HP will increase for a period of time.	Patience of the Tortoise (+1 Muscle and +3 HP) (5 Adventures)	Non-combat	1	N/A
0	Toss	This skill allows you to toss your familiar, if you have one, or something else, if you don't. Just make sure that something else isn't a dwarf -- nobody does that, y'know?	Weight <7lbs:(weight+3) damage; otherwise: (10+floor(sqrt(weight-7))) damage	Combat	1	N/A
1	Headbutt	This skill allows you to follow up a successful attack with a vicious headbutt to your opponent. The damage done by the headbutt is increased if you're wearing any kind of turtle as a helmet.	Regular attack + 10-20% of helmet power (min 1) damage; bonus with turtle helmets Enhanced by Blessings	Combat	3	125 Meat
1	Spirit Vacation	You sometimes like to spend an Adventure going on vacation in the Spirit World, which fully heals you and also recharges your mental batteries, on account of all the holiday ghoooooooooooooooooooosts. Holiday ghoooooooooooooosts.	Restore all HP Spirit Souvenirs‎ (+10 Maximum MP and 8-10 MP regeneration per adventure) (10 Adventures)	Noncombat	0 (1 adv.)	125 Meat
2	Skin of the Leatherback	This skill makes it so your back is thick, like leather. Like a leather back. Like a leatherback. You'll take less damage from enemy attacks.	Reduces damage taken by floor(level/2), minimum 1	Passive	N/A	250 Meat
2	Blessing of the War Snapper	You have learned to commune with the War Snapper, the fiercest and most violent of the Great Turtle Spirits. His guidance will increase your martial prowess and make you slightly less comfortable at parties.	Blessing of the War Snapper (Muscle +5 and Weapon Damage +5) (Intrinsic) Replaces other Blessings.	Noncombat	15	250 Meat
3	Amphibian Sympathy	Being sympathetic to the ins and outs of the amphibian lifestyle makes you more sympathetic to the lifestyles of all creatures. Your familiars will be more sympathetic and more powerful as a result of your powerful sympathy.	+5 to Familiar Weight -5 pounds to Inflatable Dodecapede	Passive	N/A	500 Meat
3	Stiff Upper Lip	If you can't have a hard, protective surface on your back, you can have the next best thing -- a hard, protective surface where a moustache would be if you had a moustache.	Stiff Upper Lip Damage Reduction: 10 (10 Adventures) Replaces other Facial Expressions.	Non-combat	10	500 Meat
4	Ghostly Shell	This skill conjures the shell of a ghostly tortoise, which envelops you (or another player) in a protective shield, greatly reducing damage taken in combat.	Ghostly Shell (+80 Damage Absorption) (X Adventures)	Buff	6	750 Meat
4	Pizza Lover	Gimme pizza. Is what you say, because you like pizza a lot.	Increases Adventure and stat gains from Pizza	Passive	N/A	750 Meat
5	Armorcraftiness	This skill allows you to make advanced helmets and pants. Advanced pants.	Allows you to make advanced Helmets, Pants, Shirts and Bucklers at the cost of 1 Adventure	Passive	N/A	1,250 Meat
5	Shell Up	Sometimes discretion is the better part of valor, and this skill allows you to embrace that fact, tame your inner turtle, crouch down, and allow your shell to protect you from your opponent's next attack.	Blocks an opponent's next attack and deals damage Enhanced by Blessings (Usable once per fight)	Combat	6	1,250 Meat
6	Tenacity of the Snapper	This skill makes you (or another player) relentless in combat, like the fierce Snapping Turtles of the Days of Old. It will increase the damage done by each strike.	Tenacity of the Snapper (+8 Weapon Damage) (X Adventures)	Buff	8	1,750 Meat
6	Spirit Snap	This skill allows you to unleash the voyeuristic corporeal fury of whichever Turtle Spirits happen to be watching you at the time.	Deals damage which scales to your Muscle Enhanced by Blessings (Usable once per fight)	Combat	10	1,750 Meat
7	Kneebutt	If you can almost hear your opponent thinking "I need you to knee me," this is the perfect skill for you. Nothing takes an opponent down a notch (MAB!) more than a well-placed knee to the naughty bits.	Regular attack + 10-20% of pants power (min 1) damage Enhanced by Blessings	Combat	4	2,500 Meat
7	Blessing of She-Who-Was	You have learned to commune with She-Who-Was, the Great Turtle Spirit who lived, loved and died long before the Spirit World even flared into existence. She will soothe and comfort you like only the ghost of ghost can.	Blessing of She-Who-Was (Mysticality +5 and Spooky Damage +5) (Intrinsic) Replaces other Blessings.	Noncombat	30	2,500 Meat
8	Empathy of the Newt	This skill makes you (or another person) temporarily gain an uncanny empathy towards your (or their) familiar	Empathy (+5 to Familiar Weight) (X Adventures)	Buff	15	3,250 Meat
8	Butts of Steel	You like powerful butts, and you cannot lie.	Improves the accuracy and damage of your Butt skills	Passive	N/A	3,250 Meat
9	Spiky Shell	You can conjure up a spiky turtle shell of psychic energy to surround you (or another player) and deal damage to enemies as they attack you (or another player (the same one I mentioned before, not just any other player.))	Spiky Shell (Damages attacking opponents) (X Adventures)	Buff	8	4,000 Meat
9	Testudinal Teachings	Years of working with turtles has made you more patient with all manner of creatures, and better at teaching them stuff.	Your familiars gain weight faster (+1 exp every 6 combats)	Passive	N/A	4,000 Meat
10	Reptilian Fortitude	By imbuing you with the physical strength of 1000 snakes and lizards, this skill temporarily boosts your maximum HP.	Reptilian Fortitude (+30 HP) (X Adventures)	Buff	10	5,000 Meat
10	Shieldbutt	We all know that a shield is primarily used to, y'know, shield one from damage. With this skill, though, your shield becomes a powerful weapon as well. Your attacks will do extra damage based on your shield power. Just try and resist the urge to change into a blue leotard with little wings on the cowl.	Regular attack + Damage based on your shield Never misses (TT only) Enhanced by Blessings Must be wearing a shield as your off-hand item	Combat	10	5,000 Meat
11	Wisdom of the Elder Tortoises	You have achieved a level of awareness that almost matches that of the Elder Tortoises in the Days of Old. Your maximum MP is dramatically increased.	+50% MP	Passive	N/A	6,250 Meat
11	Blessing of the Storm Tortoise	You have learned to commune with the Storm Tortoise, the bringer of the thunder until which no snapper will release its jaws. He will electrify you.	Blessing of the Storm Tortoise (+5% Combat Initiative and Maximum MP +10) (Intrinsic) Replaces other Blessings.	Noncombat	50	6,250 Meat
12	Astral Shell	This is a vastly improved version of the Ghostly Shell skill. It increases the amount of damage absorbed by your (or another player's) hat and pants in combat. Additionally, it will protect you (to a limited degree) from the elements of heat, cold, stench, spookiness, and sleaziness.	Astral Shell (+80 Damage Absorption) Slight resistance to all elemental damage (X Adventures)	Buff	10	7,500 Meat
12	The Long View	Your perception of time has been expanded in both directions by your communion with the Great Turtle Spirits. To you, a calendar is like a flipbook, and also an hour is like maybe an hour and ten minutes or so.	+3 Adventure(s) per day	Passive	N/A	7,500 Meat
13	Cold-Blooded Fearlessness	Ever wonder why turtles never run? It's because they're not afraid of anything, man. This skill will make you more like them -- spooky stuff won't spook you as much.	So-So Spooky Resistance	Passive	N/A	10,000 Meat
13	Spirit Boon	When the Great Turtle Spirits are in a good mood, they can be called upon to imbue you with a taste of their power. The trick is waiting until they're in a really good mood.	Receive a boon from a Great Turtle Spirit	Non-combat	30	10,000 Meat
14	Hero of the Half-Shell	Your mastery of shields has elevated you to hero-like status amongst your tortoise brethren. Your skills have the beauty and balance of a Renaissance painting. As such, whenever you take damage in combat, your Muscle will be used to reduce the damage you take instead of Moxie, whenever you are wielding a shield. NOTE: This will only take effect if your Muscle is higher than your Moxie.	Damage received normally influenced by Moxie is based on Muscle when wearing a shield (Unless your Moxie is higher)	Passive	N/A	12,500 Meat
14	Patient Smile	While everybody else freaks out all the time, rushing around from appointment to appointment like rats in an appointment maze, you've learned to relax, be patient, and let good things come to you.	Patient Smile +1 Muscle Stats Per Fight (10 Adventures) Replaces other Facial Expressions.	Non-combat	10	12,500 Meat
15	Tao of the Terrapin	Like hippies, turtles live in their clothes. Unlike hippies, turtles' clothes provide a hard protective shell for their sensitive innards. Well, unlike hippies who are only on day fifteen of a new outfit. You have sufficiently pondered the mystery of the turtle, whose clothes are both home and protection, to understand how to imbue your clothing with the same properties. As such, any hat or pants you equip will be doubled in power. Now go take a shower, hippy.	Doubles power of hats and pants for the purposes of calculating Damage Absorption and Tamer combat skills.	Passive	N/A	15,000 Meat
15	Turtle Power	You have become so attuned to the Great Turtle Spirits that when the time is right, you are capable of taking on the form of their earthly incarnation. But be careful -- with great turtle power comes great turtle responsibility.	Become a Turtle Spirit Incarnate (Requires a Glorious Blessing) (Usable once per day)	Noncombat	100	15,000 Meat
Spookyraven Manor Quest Skill
N/A	Spectral Snapper	This skill allows you to summon the spirit of a deceased snapping turtle.	(10-40) + (Muscle/5) Spooky Damage	Combat	20	N/A
Sea Floor Skill
N/A	Summon Leviatuga	You've learned to call upon Leviatuga, the Great Turtle of the Deep. He'll heed your call, and bite your enemies with his ancient, powerful jaws.	300-350 damage; works only underwater	Combat	40	N/A
Crimbo '09 Skill
N/A	Jingle Bells	This skill allows you to conjure up some festive holiday bells to hang around your familiar's neck. Or around something else, if your familiar is something that doesn't have a neck.	Jingle Jangle Jingle (Familiar will act more often in combat) (x Adventures)	Buff	5	N/A
The Traveling Trader Skill
N/A	Curiosity of Br'er Tarrypin	This skill allows you to bestow upon yourself (or another player) the homespun wisdom and innate curiosity of an anthropomorphic turtle in a folk tale.	Curiosity of Br'er Tarrypin (+1 Familiar Experience Per Combat) (x Adventures)	Buff	10	N/A

Levels

The amount of Muscle required to attain level L follows the formula Muscle = L² - 2L+ 5.

Class-Specific Powers

• +50% HP: Turtle Tamers (and Seal Clubbers) have an innate 50% bonus to their maximum HP.
• Turtle Taming: Turtle Tamers can find various turtle items around the Kingdom with no Adventure cost.
• Turtle Blessings: Turtle Tamers can receive the blessings of a Great Turtle Spirit. They will grant an intrinsic buff which bestow additional effects to their combat skills. As you adventure, Turtle Tamers slowly and steadily build up their favor, which can be unleashed with certain skills. Other classes will only receive their disdain.
• Shieldbutt Autohit: Shieldbutt will always hit when used by a Turtle Tamer, regardless of monster's defense.
• Turtle Tamers who have passed their guild's test can access The Smacketeria and, if they have learned Pulverize, use The Malus of Forethought.
• Turtle Tamers can cast Toss in combat for 0 MP.
• The Untamed Turtle's attack-blocking ability is more powerful if you are a Turtle Tamer.

Class Gear

• Turtle Tamers start with a helmet turtle and a turtle totem in their inventory.
• The Turtle Tamer's Epic Weapon is the Mace of the Tortoise.
• The Turtle Tamer's Legendary Epic Weapon is the Chelonian Morningstar.
• The Turtle Tamer's Ultimate Legendary Epic Weapon is the Flail of the Seven Aspects.
• The Turtle Tamer's Epic Hat is the Elder Turtle Shell.
• The Turtle Tamer's Epic Pants are the Galapagosian Cuisses.
• The Turtle Tamer's Epic Accessory is the Garter of the Turtle Poacher.
• The Turtle Tamer's Legendary Regalia is the Legendary Regalia of the Chelonian Overlord.
• The Turtle Tamer's Standard ascension rewards, by year:
  • 2024: moss megaphone
  • 2023: chiffon chapeau
  • 2022: Loofah lei
  • 2021: Velour vambraces
  • 2020: paraffin pith helmet
  • 2019: chalk chain
  • 2018: gabardine garland
  • 2017: aerogel akubra
  • 2016: wicker slicker
  • 2015: polyester pad
• The Turtle Tamer's Standard Hardcore ascension rewards, by year:
  • 2024: adobe adze
  • 2023: ceramic centurion shield
  • 2022: flagstone flail
  • 2021: Stained glass shield
  • 2020: terra cotta trousers
  • 2019: marble mantle
  • 2018: fiberglass foil
  • 2017: wrought-iron winch crank
  • 2016: bakelite badge
  • 2015: porcelain plus-fours
• The Turtle Tamer's Hardcore ascension reward is the stainless steel skullcap.
• The Turtle Tamer's Hardcore Oxygenarian ascension reward is the plexiglass pith helmet.
• The Turtle Tamer's Bad Moon ascension reward is the Brimstone Bunker.
• The Turtle Tamer's secret from the future reward is the brazen bracelet.
• The Turtle Tamer's Hateful Habiliment item is the Girdle of Hatred.
• The Turtle Tamer's Violent Vestments item is the Brand of Violence.
• Turtle Tamers can get a washboard shield from the Hobo Marketplace.
• The chintzy turtle brooch and Tinsel orb confers its enchantment bonus only to Turtle Tamers.
• The Dire Drifter Duds and its components confer their enchantment bonuses only to Turtle Tamers.
• The Dreadful Skeleton Suit and its components confer their enchantment bonuses only to Turtle Tamers.
• The Turtle Tamer's Nemesis Quest familiar is the Untamed Turtle.
• The Turtle Tamer's level 30 trophy is the Tzar of Turtles.

Buffs

• A totem is required to cast Turtle Tamer buffs. The totem used determines the number of adventures granted per cast:
  • turtle totem -- 5 Adventures
  • Ouija Board, Ouija Board -- 7 Adventures
  • Mace of the Tortoise -- 10 Adventures
  • Chelonian Morningstar -- 15 Adventures
  • Flail of the Seven Aspects -- 20 Adventures
  • primitive alien totem -- 30 Adventures
• If a specific totem is wielded, it will be used to cast all buffs. Otherwise, the best totem in the player's inventory will be automatically selected.

Notes

• Many Turtle Tamers use their high muscle stat to fight with melee attacks, aided by their buffs.

History

• Turtle Tamers received their level 13 skill on March 5, 2006, and a more thorough skill revamp on March 15, 2006.
• Turtle Tamers received (another) revamp on November 7, 2013, the 4th class to be revamped on 2013, after disturbing some Turtle Spirits in The Spirit World. 15 brand new skills were added, and while Butt Combos were removed, in place is the ability to receive the blessings of a Turtle Spirit, granting an intrinsic buff that boosts combat skills and get stronger as you spend time earning their favor. Shieldbutt was also changed to only auto-hit when used by a Turtle Tamer. See Turtle Tamer/Old for an archive of the skills prior to the change.

References

• The description of this class refers to the classic fable, "The Tortoise and the Hare", in which a slow and steady tortoise defeats a boastful hare in a race.
• The level 5 title, Newt Herder, may allude to a quote from the Star Wars movie The Empire Strikes Back, in which Princess Leia calls Han Solo a "scruffy-looking nerf herder." Also, Nerf Herder is the name of the band that is best known for the theme song to Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
• The level 12 title, Cobra Commander, is also the name of the masked nemesis of the G.I. Joe team and the leader of Cobra Command.
• The level 14 title, Asp Master, refers to the insult "Assmaster".

Classes
Seal Clubber	Turtle Tamer	Pastamancer	Sauceror	Disco Bandit	Accordion Thief