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|Locations||A Crowd of Adventurers|
You approach a tall, orange-armored fellow to ask if you're in the right place for the Hottest Adventurer contest. "Yes, good sir, but I warn you -- your chances against me are naught!" he says, puffing out his chest (you think -- it's hard to tell under the armor.)
"Oh yeah? And who are you?"
"I..." he booms, "am the Lavalier!"
"Like a microphone?" you ask.
"Why... no... I..." he sputters, "like... like a cavalier, but lava. Hold on. Here, maybe this will help."
He whistles, and a giant horse made of magma trots up.
"Oh, okay. I get it now." you say, as he mounts the horse and begins thundering toward you, molten lance aloft.
He spikes your <ankle> with his red-hot lance. (CRITICAL HIT!) Ow! Ouch! Ugh!
He charges at you, but pauses briefly to bow to a passing damsel.
He charges at you with his red-hot lance, but you do a red-hot dance and get out of the way. (It's the Lambada.)
You distract his horse with a baked apple. You just happened to have one in your bag. I don't know why we didn't mention it at any point before this.
|You gain ? <substat>.|
- This is the final Hottest Adventurer.