Despite the tangles in her long auburn hair and the crack in her eyeglasses, The Author still possesses a wild grace and beauty that causes you to hesitate in your attack and... "I said knock it off!" you growl.
"Oh, everybody's a critic," she sniffs, looking up from her notepad. "I suppose you'd prefer I wrote myself some kind of cliché supervillain "I'm going to rule the world!" speech?"
"I'd rather we just get on with the fighting, if you aren't going to give yourself up quietly!"
"Ugh, fine," she says, and starts writing again. "And then Batfellow punched himself in the head."
Fortunately, you manage to duck just in time.
"Batfellow punched himself in the face again," The Author writes. "'Stop hitting yourself,' The Author said, 'Why do you keep hitting yourself?' But he continued to hit himself all the same."
The Author writes something down, and you slug yourself in the gut, really hard. "Hmm, no, I think I like the face better," she says, scratching out the last bit and correcting it. You slug yourself in the
gut face, really hard.
"And then he kicked himself right in the face!" The Author writes. "That's not even possioof!" you growl.