Stench vampire

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Stench vampire
Monster ID 1415
Locations Dreadsylvanian Castle
Hit Points 800
Attack 500
Defense 500
Initiative 25
Meat None
Phylum undead
Elements stench
Resistance None
Monster Parts head, arm, leg, torso
cod cape, Dreadsylvanian Almanac page, Freddy Kruegerand
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
stench vampire You're fighting Julian Foulmurder

You ready your weapon as a vampire in an ancient and yellowing lace gown drifts down the hall toward you. As she gets near, you realize that she's old. Very very old. You know that weird smell that old people sometimes get when they don't or can't take care of themselves properly? Sweat and antiseptic and old lady perfume? Multiply that by about 600 years.

Hit Message(s):

The vampire bites your <forehead>. That's bad enough on its own, but god only knows what kind of infection you're going to get from it. Ooh! Ugh! (stench damage)

She doesn't manage to actually hit you, but the stink alone is enough to knock you off your feet. Argh! Ow! (stench damage)

You aren't sure what's worse: having your blood sucked out, or the thought of how many dead things that mouth has touched recently. Ouch! Eek! (stench damage)

The vampire bites your neck. The worst part of this is her terrible breath. Unexpectly, it smells like she's been eating raw garlic. Eek! Eek! (stench damage)

She bites you on the arse, which instantly turns green from some terrible infection. Eek! Ooh! (stench damage)

Critical Hit Message:

The vampire bites your neck, and drinks some of your blood. And backwashes. (CRITICAL HIT!) Ooh! Ugh! (stench damage)

Miss Message(s):

The vampire tries to bite your <forehead>, but you push her away. Man, when was the last time she brushed her teeth?

She starts to bite you, but gets a whiff of her own breath and starts coughing uncontrollably.

She tries to attack you, but her eyes are watering from her own overpowering stench, making it difficult to target you accurately.

The vampire starts to bite your neck, but you throw a breath mint in her mouth, and she almost chokes.

She tries to bite you, but you keep flinching away from the terrible smell.

Fumble Message:

The vampire takes a moment to spray some Binaca in her mouth. It doesn't help. (FUMBLE!)

Special Move(s):

The vampire shrieks at you, exhaling a lungful of corpse-breath.

HPYou lose 1-10 hit points.
HPEnemy regains 10 HP

After Combat

Dv codcape.gifYou acquire an item: cod cape
Dv recipe.gifYou acquire an item: Dreadsylvanian Almanac page
Dv krueggerand.gifYou acquire an item: Freddy Kruegerand
You gain ??? <substat>.

Occurs at Dreadsylvanian Castle


  • This monster cannot be copied.
  • The Freddy Kruegerand and Dreadsylvanian Almanac page drops are not affected by item drop modifiers. They are similar to the beer lens drop and drops from crates. In particular, they can still drop after being stomped.
  • If any elements are banished, each round of combat with a stench Dreadsylvanian take damage with a message:
    • You inhale deeply to acclimate yourself to the stink, but end up gagging and retching.
    • Uggh, it smells like Death farted in here.
    • You know how if you smell something bad for long enough, your brain adjusts and you kind of stop smelling it? That's not happening here.
    • Boy does it stink in here.
    • Remember how good a freshly-baked loaf of bread smells? No, you don't, because you've been marinating in this stink too long.
    • Something smells terrible. You sniff your armpits, wondering if it's you.
    • What is that smell? Did something die in here? Like, recently?
    • You glance around, trying to identify the source of that awful stink.
    • You breathe through your mouth, trying to avoid smelling whatever you're smelling.
HPYou lose Y hit points. (stench damage)
  • If any elements are banished, getting hit by a stench Dreadsylvanian adds turns of Nauseated:
Nauseated.gifYou acquire an effect: Nauseated
(duration: N+1 Adventures)
  • Every round, vampires suck your blood, healing themselves.
    • The vampire turns into a reeking bat, does something bats do a lot that is really disgusting, then turns back.
    • The vampire shrieks at you, exhaling a lungful of corpse-breath.
    • The vampire's spit smells like blood and death, and he's slobbering all over while he sucks your blood.
    • The vampire stops sucking your blood to belch a belch that smells like fresh blood and old corpses.
    • The vampire turns into a cloud of mist, but it's a green cloud that smells horrible.
    • The vampire's breath smells like a corpse, and not a particularly fresh one, as he sucks your blood.
    • You smell burning feathers as the vampire sucks some blood out of your brain.
    • You think the vampire's turning into mist, but the little cloud that just came out of him doesn't smell like mist at all.
    • You're not sure what's worse: the vampire's fangs in your neck, or his stinky breath.
  • The name, image, and introduction text of this monster are all randomly selected:

You barely have time to react to the vampire screaming down toward the hall at you, with her claws extended and hatred in her eyes and, it turns out, an ancient and powerful reek. Seriously, I know adventures talk about the "stench of death" pretty frequently, but it's not often you find it so literally represented. You briefly wonder if the classical vampiric aversion to running water also includes showering.

A vampire with long, matted hair and ragged clothes scuttles out of the shadows toward you, hissing, her eyes glowing red in the dim light and... and... phew. Man. It seems that not only has she been living on rats for the past few centuries, she's also been rolling around in the rotting corpses.
If you've ever heard the term "blood bath", you might have thought that it's something vampires do to stay clean and hygienic. Well, some vampires do, but the thing is, when you've got enough blood to fill a bathtub, it doesn't just dry out. It rots. And it stinks.
This vampire has apparently decided to drape the intestines of her enemies about her in lieu of clothing, presumably because it's scary, and because she's insane. And both those things are true, but there's also the fact that it smells absolutely horrible. I mean, you know what those intestines were being used for previously, right?