Sponge

Sponge
Monster ID	739
Locations	An Octopus's Garden
Hit Points	1000
Attack	350
Defense	405
No-Hit	360
Initiative	50
Meat	None
Phylum	fish
Elements	None
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	head
Drops sand dollar, sand dollar, sand dollar, slab of sponge
Manuel Entry
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 You're fighting a sponge

This is a sea sponge, one of those things that both keeps the sea floor clean and keeps borrowing sand dollars from all the other fish. It's pretty bad with managing its income -- it used to live in a pineapple under the sea, but the bank foreclosed on it. Which, given how stupid the whole concept is, it's probably a blessing.

Hit Message(s):

It sings its incredibly annoying theme song until you bang your head against a rock. Argh! Eek! Oof!

It smacks you in the head. Don't ask why, don't ask why -- sixteen candles down the drain. Ooh! Argh! Eek!

It aggressively cleans your shoulder. And I mean aggresively^[sic]. Like, it takes a layer of skin off. Oof! Ow! Argh!

It smacks you with a piece of its pineapple house. Gah. Who lives in a pineapple under the sea, anyway? Ugh! Ooh! Eek!

Critical Hit Message:

A loan shark tries to break the sponge's knees to collect on a debt. But the sponge doesn't have knees, so the shark breaks yours instead. Now, how is that fair? Ooh! Oof! Ow!

Miss Message(s):

It sings its incredibly annoying theme song. You tune it out.

It asks if you've seen Mary, and if you have, please could you help her? You respond that you haven't seen her, but you'll keep an eye out.

It tries to clean your <shins>, but your <elbow> just isn't that dirty.

It tries to smack you with a piece of its pineapple house, but forgot that its house got foreclosed.

Fumble Message:

It takes a break to try and mooch some food off of one of the other fish in this area of the ocean. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You acquire an item: sand dollar (10% chance)*

You acquire an item: sand dollar (7% chance)*

You acquire an item: sand dollar (5% chance)*

You acquire an item: slab of sponge (4% chance)*

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Occurs at An Octopus's Garden.

References

• Sponge is a term for someone who constantly borrows or lives at the expense of others.
• The "pineapple under the sea" refers to the cartoon SpongeBob SquarePants, made by Nickelodeon Studios. The titular character is an idiosyncratic, anthropomorphic sponge who lives in a pineapple, which happens to be under the sea. The theme song for the show also includes the line "Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?"
• "Don't ask why, don't ask why -- sixteen candles down the drain" is part of the lyrics of the song "Molly (Sixteen Candles)" by the American band Sponge.
• Similarly, "Have You Seen Mary" is another Sponge song, from their album Wax Ecstatic, which includes the lyrics: "If you see Mary, please, will you help her?"