Smut orc pervert

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Smut orc pervert
Monster ID 1234
Locations The Smut Orc Logging Camp
Hit Points 69
Attack 69
Defense 69
No-Hit 79
Initiative 50
Meat None
Phylum orc
Elements sleaze
Resistance None
Monster Parts head, arm, leg, torso
Drops
smut orc keepsake box
Manuel smut orc sunglasses
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
smut orc pervert You're fighting a smut orc pervert

This smut orc has such a filthy mind that he's able -- though it's quite a stretch -- to make dirty jokes and innuendos about everything from the smut orc's jobs to their building materials. The other orcs take such offense at his jokes that he's forced to hide from them. He usually hides deep in a bush, or perhaps down and dirty in a trench.

Hit Message(s):

He lays some pipe on you, giggling all the while. Ow! Ow!

He screws a screw into you, winking and asking if you "get it." Ow! Oof!

He squirts his caulk in your mouth, laughing uproariously. Ouch! Ooh! (sleaze damage)

He tells a joke about helping his Uncle Jack off a horse, sniggering so hard he can barely speak. Ugh! Ouch! (sleaze damage)

Critical Hit Message:

He whips out his thick caulking gun and covers you in thick caulk, winking and nudging you so hard you get bruises. Ouch! Oof! Ooh! (sleaze damage)

Miss Message(s):

He tries to tell you a dirty joke, but your ears are dirty enough that you're unfazed.

He tries to screw a screw into you, but he's too screwy and screws it up.

He tries to squirt his caulk in your mouth, but you tell him not to be so caulky.

Fumble Message:

He runs out of caulk, and declines to make a joke about that particular situation. He just runs off to fill up the gun again. (FUMBLE!)


After Combat

Keepsakebox.gifYou acquire an item: smut orc keepsake box (100% chance)*
Bigglasses.gifYou acquire an item: smut orc sunglasses (? chance)*
You gain 20-24 <substat>.

Notes

  • This monster cannot be copied.
  • Appears on the 21st adventure in the Logging Camp, and then every 20 adventures exactly.
    • This monster can be sniffed, but that has no effect on frequency.

History

  • Prior to the update on February 20th, 2019, the monster had 75 HP, 85 Attack and 85 Defense.

References

  • The monster's stats being all 69 refers to the sex position (NSFW).