|Locations||The Obligatory Pirate's Cove|
|Monster Parts||head, arm, leg, torso|
This pirate is pretty shifty. He shifts to and fro, attempting to lay the smack down on you all the while.
He lays the smack down on you from both sides at once. Somehow. Oof! Ugh! Ouch! Oof!
He shifts over and lifts up his eyepatch, showing you what's beneath it. The horror.... the absolute horror. Ouch! Oof! Argh! Ooh!
He shiftily asks you for some spare change, then punches you when you go for your wallet. Ugh! Oof! Ow! Argh!
He shifts back and forth, laying the smack down on you from both sides. He does the day shift, the night shift, and the swing shift. Then he puts on a shift and continues to shift blows (and the blame) to you. It's all very punny. Ooh! Ooh! Argh! Ouch!
He tries to peg you with his peg-leg, but only succeeds in falling ovarrr.
He shifts over and tries to lay the smack down on you, but his shift key gets stuck and he can only stand there shouting.
He starts to lift up his eyepatch, but you avert your two good eyes.
He shiftily asks you for spare change, but you don't give him any.
He starts to shiftily attack again, but finds that he can no longer shift. Once he figures out he's shiftless, he decides to lay about for a while. (FUMBLE!)
|You gain 36-54 Meat (average: 45, stdev: 4.06)*|
|You acquire an item: arrrgyle socks (10.5% chance)*|
|You acquire an item: flaregun (29.3% chance)*|
|You acquire an item: sunken chest (29.9% chance)*|
|You gain 17-18 <substat>.|
Occurs at The Obligatory Pirate's Cove.
- The Shifty Pirate's image has been "shifted" from the other pirates' images (it is a mirror image).
- The second miss message is a reference to internet etiquette, where typing in all caps is the equivalent of shouting.