Sack of doorknobs

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sack of doorknobs
sack of doorknobs

This is a burlap sack filled with doorknobs. Doorknob thieves are something of a problem in the Kingdom, but generally their victims are trapped in various rooms and can't file police reports. All of the doorknobs in here are pretty hefty, so you can deal some decent damage throwing them. The sack also comes in handy if you have to do some on-the-fly comparative intelligence tests.

Type: ranged weapon (2-handed sack)
Damage: 11 - 22
Moxie Required: 40
Selling Price: 110 Meat.

(In-game plural: sax of doorknobs)
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Item number: 1472
Description ID: 240242422
View in-game: view
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Obtained From

The Armory and Leggery (825 meat)


You throw several doorknobs from your sack of doorknobs, proving that you're smarter than your weapon and hitting for X damage. KERBLAM! WHAM! BARF!
You whip a cheap aluminum doorknob out of your sack of doorknobs and throw it at <it>, hitting <it> right between the eyes for X damage. BONK! BOOF! SPLAT!
You whip a cut-glass doorknob (like from grandma's house) out of your sack of doorknobs and throw it at <it>, doing X damage. BAM! BOOF! ZOT!
You whip a heavy brass doorknob out of your sack of doorknobs and throw it at <it>. <It> fails to dodge, proving <it> is dumber than your weapon and taking X damage. SOCKO! WHAMMO! WHAM!
You whip a lead-painted doorknob out of your sack of doorknobs and throw it for X damage. It's sweet, like lead paint is sweet. (I bet it is, too.) KERBLAM! SPLAT! BIFF!


  • The description of the "comparative intelligence tests" refers to the expression "dumber than a sack of doorknobs".
  • "It's sweet, like lead paint is sweet" in the hit messages refers to a few of the lyrics in "Cyclops Rock" by They Might Be Giants.


TOP 10 sack of doorknobs collections
1. sven oRa eicZen - 2880 | 2. Pastahead - 2002 | 3. Potzee - 1021 | 4. T Sarducci - 605 | 5. reddening - 545
6. Club - 288 | 7. Mistress of the Obvious - 213 | 8. Choad - 125 | 9. Saturday Night Hay Fever - 111 | 10. AlmAlphiA - 101
Collection data courtesy of ePeterso2 and Jicken Wings