Possessed silverware drawer

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Possessed silverware drawer
Monster ID 372
Locations The Haunted Kitchen
Hit Points 22
Attack 22
Defense 18
No-Hit 15
Initiative 50
Meat None
Phylum undead
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts knob
antique packet of ketchup, corn holder, eggbeater; shiny butcherknife (when Running Away)
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
possessed silverware drawer You're fighting a possessed silverware drawer

This is a silverware drawer that appears to have developed both free will and malice towards Adventurers. Clouds of cutlery whirl menacingly above it as you approach.

Hit Message(s):

It sends a fork hurtling toward you, which hits you and forks up your <forehead>. Eek! Ow! Ooh!

It sends two forks at you, which hit you in each eyelid. Here's forks in your eye! Ow! Ouch! Ouch!

It slings a spoon and a butterknife at you, which hit you in your <solar plexus> and your <ear>, respectively. Ugh! Eek! Ugh!

Critical Hit Message:

It sends an immense swarm of knives at you, all of which hit you in exactly the same place -- your <arse>. It really, really, really hurts. Argh! Argh! Ugh!

Miss Message(s):

It sends a fork at you, but you quickly bend all of the tines, rendering it harmless.

It sends two forks toward you, but you catch the forks and pitch them out of the way.

It tries to carve your heart out with a spoon (it's more painful that way, you see,) but it turns out to be physically impossible to do so.

Fumble Message:

It sends an immense swarm of knives at you, but they all end up missing and forming a cool-looking you-shaped pattern on the wall. (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Condiment.gifYou acquire an item: antique packet of ketchup (30% chance)*
Cornholder.gifYou acquire an item: corn holder (15% chance)*
Eggbeater.gifYou acquire an item: eggbeater (5% chance)*
You gain 1 <substat>.

Occurs at The Haunted Kitchen.


  • If you choose to Run Away during the fight, you'll see the following text.
You run away like a sissy coward.

As you run out the door of the Haunted Kitchen, a butcherknife flies out of the drawer and sticks in the doorjamb next to you. You grab it as you flee.
Shineknife.gifYou acquire an item: shiny butcherknife
  • The shiny butcherknife is a one time drop.


  • The miss text "carve your heart out with a spoon (it's more painful that way, you see,)" refers to dialogue from the movie Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.
  • The attack text "Here's forks in your eye!" may be a reference to the toast, "Here's mud in your eye."
  • The fumble text is a reference to a classic cartoon miss gag.
  • The way you get the shiny butcherknife refers to The Matrix, where an agent takes over a woman cooking and throws a knife at Neo while he is running away.