Possessed Can of Creepy Pasta

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Possessed Can of Creepy Pasta
Monster ID 1465
Locations every 35-40 adventures during Peripatetic Pasta
Hit Points  ?
Attack  ?
Defense unknown
Initiative 0
Meat None
Phylum weird
Elements spooky
Resistance 100%
Monster Parts unknown
Drops
tangled mass of creepy pasta, tangled mass of creepy pasta
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Possessed Can of Creepy Pasta You're fighting a Possessed Can of Creepy Pasta

This can of pasta is spooky in many ways. First, it's probably made out of bone meal, chicken cloacae, and preservatives. Second, it has a shelf life that just says "LONGER THAN YOURS, MEAT SACK." Third, it's running at you screaming. And finally, it's alphabet pasta, but the only two letters are "b" and "o," so it can only say "Booo" and "OooOoo."

And, I guess "boob," but that's creepy when there's only one of 'em, right? Oh, and "Bob," but you know Bob. That dude's spooky.

Hit Message(s):

It slings its spooky lid at you, giving you a cut that lets the horror of the universe in. And some bacteria and stuff. Oof! Argh! Eek! (spooky damage)

It sprays you with its spooky sauce. You succumb to the spooky salvo. Ouch! Argh! Ooh! (spooky damage)

It throws a "boo" into your mouth. It tastes like clowns with sharpened fangs tickling the back of your neck. Ow! Oof! Argh! (spooky damage)

It spells out a horrible proclamation of doom, somehow using only the letters "b" and "o." It's terrifying. Ooh! Oof! Oof! (spooky damage)

It throws a "boo" at you, and it wails as it smacks you in the face. Ooh! Ouch! Ow! (spooky damage)

It wails and flails its noodly arms around. It's pretty creepy. Ow! Ooh! Ugh! (spooky damage)

Critical Hit Message:

It throws a series of "boooos" at you, each with more "o"s than the last, each spookier than the one before. By the time it stops, your heart is pounding and your hair is streaked with gray. Ugh! Ouch! Argh! (spooky damage)

Miss Message(s):

It slings its spooky lid at you, but you don't flip your lid and manage to dodge it.

It sprays spooky sauce at you, but you saucily dodge.

It throws a "boo" at you, but you avoid getting it in your mouth.

It tries to spell out a horrible proclamation of doom, but just looks like it's accusing you of having "B.O."

It tries to throw a "boo" at you, but misspells it and instead offers you something for 10 meat OBO.

It wails and flails its noodly arms, but you avoid being touched by any of its noodly appendages.

Fumble Message:

It throws a series of "booos" at you, but you hiss right back at it, and it doesn't seem to know how to handle being heckled. (FUMBLE!)


After Combat

Boobooboo.gifYou acquire an item: tangled mass of creepy pasta (% chance)*
Boobooboo.gifYou acquire an item: tangled mass of creepy pasta (% chance)*
Boobooboo.gifYou acquire an item: tangled mass of creepy pasta (% chance)*

Appears as a wandering monster, part of the mysticality class revamp.

References

  • Creepypastas are short stories, usually posted on message boards, about the paranormal and scary.
  • "Noodly appendages," mentioned in a miss message, is a term popularized by the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.