One Rustic Nightstand

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statgains are 100/200?

One Rustic Nightstand
One Rustic Nightstand

Having given the nightstand an old-fashioned beating, you approach its no-longer-animated form.


Check the top drawer

In the top drawer of the nightstand, you find a paperback of the... shall we say... racy variety. Looks like Lady Spookyraven was a little more adventurous than the historians gave her credit for!

You flip through the book, and even a cursory glance teaches you a few things you didn't know about the art of love. Moxious!

You gain X Chutzpah.

Check the bottom drawer

You open the drawer, and a little ball of ghostly light darts out of it and directly into your sack.

Hmm. Do you think it did that on purpose?

Spirit2.gifYou acquire an item: grouchy restless spirit
or

This drawer seems to be empty. What a disappointment.


Investigate the jewelry
remains of a jilted mistress This monster is Undead -- (edit metadata)
Mistress.gif

Use a ghost key

You stick the ghost key into the space between the now-dead nightstand and the spirit that once inhabited it. As the key turns, you experience an entire lifetime's worth of memories -- loves, more loves, some recreational drugs, and a bunch more loves. It's a pretty exciting lifetime. As the key concludes its arc, it vanishes as you snap back to reality.

You gain 200 Sarcasm.

Check under the nightstand

Under the nightstand, you find a book that at first glance appears to be a racy novel, but turns out to just be a cookbook. You idly wonder if Lady Spookyraven was as disappointed when she found out as you are right now.

Book4.gifYou acquire an item: Engorged Sausages and You

Ignore it

You decline to investigate the nightstand.


Occurs after defeating an animated rustic nightstand in The Haunted Bedroom.

Notes

  • Fighting the remains of a jilted mistress takes a turn, unlike every other nightstand post-combat choice.
    • The option will not appear if you have 0 adventures left.
  • The stats from the top drawer (X) are approximately 1x mainstat, capped at 200.
  • The Engorged Sausages and You choice does not always appear.

History

  • Before a trivial update on December 09, 2014, only one jilted mistress per day could be encountered via the Rustic Nightstand. Subsequently, the Investigate the jewelry option didn't consume an adventure and yielded the message:
You don't find any additional jewelry of interest.
  • Before March 9, 2021, you could fight the jilted mistress even if you had zero turns remaining, effectively acting as a free combat in the process.
Sm2 1a.gif
Sm2 1b.gif
One Nightstand in The Haunted Bedroom
Mahogany   Ornate   Rustic   Elegant   Simple  
Check the top drawer half of a memo or old coin purse Open the top drawer 400-600 Meat Check the top drawer 50-200 Cheek Open the single drawer Lady Spookyraven's finest gown Look in the top drawer old leather wallet
Check the bottom drawer Lose HP Open the bottom drawer 50-200 Magicalness Check the bottom drawer grouchy restless spirit or nothing Break a leg (off of the nightstand) elegant nightstick Look in the bottom drawer 50-200 Fortitude
Look under the nightstand Spookyraven Manor Quest Item Look behind the nightstand Lord Spookyraven's spectacles Investigate the jewelry Fight remains of a jilted mistress Use a ghost key 100 of each stat Use a ghost key 200 Beefiness
Use a ghost key Gain meat Look under the nightstand disposable instant camera Use a ghost key 200 Smarm
Use a ghost key 200 Wizardliness Check under the nightstand (rare) Engorged Sausages and You