Olaf the Janitor

Olaf the Janitor is located in the Brotherhood of the Smackdown. He will assign you a variety of quests.

---

My Other Car Is Made of Meat

• Message before having the level requirement of the bitchin' meatcar quest, or the first time you visit if you completed the quest before the guild changes were made:

"Ah, you must be the new guild member! I'm Olaf, janitor of the Brotherhood. Mighty warrior against dirt!"

He narrows his eyes. "I hope you remembered to wipe your feet," he adds, in a menacing tone.

• Message on initial visit:

You ask Olaf about the meatcar.

He gives you a guilty look.

"The meatcar? Um. Well, I parked it at Degrassi Knoll, but by Boris's Hammer, when I got back to it those fiendish gnolls had stolen it!

Here, I'll give you a list of the parts you need to build a new one. Don't tell Gunther, all right?"

You acquire an item: Degrassi Knoll shopping list

• Message on subsequent vists:

"Have you found all of the meatcar parts? Once you have them all, you'll need to use meat paste to stick them all together. Fear not, warrior -- it is not a complicated device."

• Message after having built the bitchin' meatcar:

"Ah, I see you have rebuilt the meatcar. Thank you, <name>. After such trials, you deserve a respite -- perhaps a trip to the beach? I shall mark it on your map for you.

Keep your eyes peeled if you decide to head South of the Border -- it can be a dangerous place. If you're in the mood for something safer, you can always just head to the travel agency instead."

• Message after having built the bitchin' meatcar and talked to him at least once before:

Olaf looks up from his mopping, and gives you a friendly nod.

Another Errand I Mean Quest

See Another Errand I Mean Quest.

[Player Name] and [Familiar Name] Go To White Citadel

• Message on initial visit:

"My friend, I must request a favor from you! I have spent the morning fighting a mess of unholy proportions that had beseiged our bathroom, and I was forced to miss lunch. I suffer from a great hunger! I have placed a takeout order with the White Citadel near Whitey's Grove. If you would sally forth and acquire it for me, I will compensate you."

• Message on subsequent visits:

"You have brought me no food? Do not tempt my wrath, for wrath brought on by hunger is a fearsome wrath indeed! Also, I'll totally bash you with my mop. Go now to Whitey's Grove in the Distant Woods, and I will pay you when you return with the food that I require."

• Message after receiving the White Citadel Satisfaction Satchel:

"Ah, a grease-soaked repast to fill me manly arteries! Well done, [Player Name]! In return I give you this mighty talisman of good fortune. May it serve you well, my friend!"

You acquire an item: lucky rabbit's foot

[playername]'s Delivery Service

• Message on initial visit:

Ah, <playername>! It must be fate that conspires to bring us together at this time, for I have a request to make of you, a mighty task to test your mettle! I have recently purchased an item of great power from the mysterious forges of the 7-foot Dwarves, but I have yet to receive it. The quest upon which I would have you embark, is to infiltrate the subterranean factories of the Dwarves, disguised as one of their own, and recover for me the item I seek!"

"Umm..." you hesitate.

"I'll pay you."

"Oh, well, in that case, sure."

• Message on subsequent visits:

How goes the quest, mighty adventurer? Have you not yet recovered that artifact of which I spoke? Get thee hence to the forges of the 7-foot Dwarves, through the tunnels connected to their mine-face, and return forthwith with the necessary package, and I shall reward you handsomely!

• After finding the thick padded envelope:

You give the large thick envelope to Olaf, who accepts it with a gleam in his eye. "Huzzah! I see that you have returned triumphantly, my friend! Now, feast your eyes on what miracles those ancient craftsmen have wrought..."

He tears open the package, and the object inside gleams with a brilliant light. "Behold! The power and glory of Dwarven Steel Wool! No rust stain will be safe! No tile grout shall remain uncleansed! There shall be a mighty polishing indeed!"

He hands you some meat, saying, "Thank you, my friend, you have done me a great service this day. In the annals of history, your deeds shall not be forgotten."

You gain 1,000 Meat.

References

• According to Riff on the November 9, 2006, radio show, he named the janitor Olaf as a favor to another staffer's barbarian character.