Novio Cadáver

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Novio Cadáver
Monster ID 636
Locations every 25-35 adventures on El Dia de Los Muertos Borrachos
Hit Points 75% of Defense
Attack Moxie - 3 (cap at 10 000)
Defense Muscle - 3 (cap at 10 000)
Initiative 0
Meat None
Phylum undead
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts head, arm, leg, torso
Drops
kamicorpse-ee (below level 5), corpsedriver (level 5 and above)
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Novio Cadáver You're fighting El Novio Cadáver

This is the legendary Novio Cadáver (literally the "Corpse Groom"). Legend has it that he was so nervous on the day of his wedding that he had a few drinks to calm his nerves before driving to the ceremony. Tragically, he overestimated his ability to drive drunk, and never made it to his own wedding. His Bitchin' Meatcar was found wrapped around a tree, and his body was found lying to the left, and the right, and ten feet ahead of the tree.

I know that's a pretty depressing story, but hey -- you don't become a wailing spirit by quietly dying in your sleep, you know.

Hit Message(s):

He strangles you with his bow tie. The effect is only moderately more uncomfortable than actually *wearing* a bow tie. Ouch! Oof!

He puts on his wedding ring and backhands you. Ow, not the ring hand! Ooh! Oof! Argh!

He pelts you with rice. It stings a little. Ouch! Ouch! Ugh! Ow!

He takes off his patent-leather shoe and throws it at you. Ow! Who throws a shoe? Ugh! Ow! Eek!

Critical Hit Message:

He pulls a pair of thong underwear from his tuxedo pocket and stares blankly at it - it must be a relic from his pre-mortem bachelor party. After a few minutes, he uses it to throttle the life out of you. Ooh! Argh! Argh! Ooh! Ow!

Miss Message(s):

He tries to pelt you with rice, but it's cooked rice, so it doesn't hurt.

He tries to strangle you with his bow tie, but it's a clip-on and the clip breaks.

He throws his patent-leather shoe at you, but you patently refuse to be hit by it.

He pulls a pair of thong underwear from his tuxedo pocket and stares blankly at it - it must be a relic from his pre-mortem bachelor party.

Fumble Message:

He tries to hit you with his ring hand, but it dislodges from his wrist and he has to re-attach it. (FUMBLE!)


After Combat

Corpseshot.gifYou acquire an item: kamicorpse-ee (100% chance)*
Corpsedriver.gifYou acquire an item: corpsedriver (100% chance)*
You gain some <substat>.

Occurs at random locations during the El Dia de Los Muertos Borrachos.

Notes

  • This monster scales to your stats.
  • Kamicorpse-ees will only drop for characters below level 5, while corpsedrivers will only drop for characters level 5 and above.
  • When attempting to use an odor extractor, you will get the message: You can't find a good place to stick the syringe.
  • This monster cannot be copied.

References

  • "Ow! Who throws a shoe?" is taken from the movie Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery, where it is uttered by the eponymous character after bad guy Random Task throws a shoe at him.
  • "Cooked rice" refers to an urban legend that rice thrown at weddings kills birds by expanding and popping their stomachs. Reportedly, some weddings replaced uncooked rice with cooked in order to prevent hurting birds.
  • This character's name is a reference to the Tim Burton movie Corpse Bride, where it could be assumed that this monster was the Corpse Bride's husband-to-be.