Mob Penguin Capo
|Mob Penguin Capo|
|Locations||The Copperhead Club|
|Monster Parts||beak, flipper, foot, head|
This is one of the heads of the Penguin Mafia, just under Don Pygoscelis himself. He comes to the Copperhead Club because their spaghetti is the best in the Kingdom, they have good happy hour specials, and no one minds when he flips out and sprays the entire room with fire from his tommy gun.
In fact, gunfire is such a common occurrence at the Club that there are ammunition vending machines in the bathrooms.
He kicks you with his taloned feet. I mean, sure, he has spiffy two-tone wingtips on them, but it still hurts. Ugh! Ow!
He shoots you with his tommy gun, making you bounce around like a pinball controlled by a deaf, dumb, and blind kid. Ouch! Eek!
He hits you with a blast of gunfire from the tommy gun. You can see it, hear it, and feel it. Eek! Ow!
He pecks you in the <nipple> with his sharp penguin beak. Eek! Ooh!
He runs out of ammo for his tommy gun, so he just slaps you with a flipper. It's surprisingly painful. Eek! Ouch!
He whacks you with a kneecapping stick, about where you'd expect him to. Ouch! Eek!
He nods almost imperceptibly to two hulking (okay, so they're waist-height instead of knee-height) penguin goons. They rush forward and flipper-smack you senseless. Argh! Ugh!
He kicks you with his taloned feet, but they don't scratch you through the spiffy two-tone wingtips he's wearing.
He shoots at you with his tommy gun, but is too deaf, dumb, and blind to hit.
He tries to hit you with a blast of gunfire from his tommy gun, but he can't see you or hear you well enough to hit.
He tries to peck you, but you tell him not to be a pecker.
He tries to slap you with a flipper, but you're faster on land than he is.
He tries to whack you with a kneecapping stick, but you keep your kneecaps well away from him.
He stops to twirl some spaghetti around his fork and spear a meatball, while delivering a mush-mouthed monologue about how you're breaking his heart with your betrayal of the family honor. (FUMBLE!)
|You gain 160-240 Meat (average: 200, stdev: 16.73)*|
|You acquire an item: drum of tommy ammo (30 chance)*|
|You acquire an item: drum of tommy ammo (20 chance)*|
|You acquire an item: tommy gun (5 chance)*|
Occurs at The Copperhead Club.