Lolrus

Lolrus
Monster ID	1115
Locations	The Lollipop Forest
Hit Points	70
Attack	60
Defense	60
Initiative	50
Meat	None
Phylum	beast
Elements	None
Resistance	None
Monster Parts	arm, head, tail, torso, tusks
Drops lollipop stick, lollipop stick, strawberyl
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data

 You're fighting a lolrus

This is a walrus made out of lollipop sticks, hard candy, and some cotton candy for the mustache. It's still one of nature's most adorably dopey-looking animals, but it's more likely to give you diabeetus.

Hit Message(s):

It whispers into your ear. Its whiskers give you blispers and bliskers. Eek! Ouch! (spooky damage)

It stabs you with one of its tusks. Man, it's going to get kicked out of the lollipop guild for Conduct Unbecoming if it keeps that up. Eek! Ouch!

It stomps on your kidney with its tiny lollipop stick legs. Or are they fins, in this case? Hard to tell. Ouch! Oof!

It stabs you with a sugar tusk. Sugar Tusk, by the way, is the name of my Mastodon cover band. Ow! Eek!

Critical Hit Message:

He calls over his buddy the carpenter, who pounds on your calf with a hammer made out of sugar.Ooh! Ugh! (spooky damage)

Miss Message(s):

It tries to spear you with a tusk, but it can't waddle fast enough to catch you.

It tries to stab you with a sugar tusk, but you say, "tsk, tsk" to the tusk.

It starts to stab you with a tusk, but a representative from the lollipop guild threatens to expel him for Conduct Unbecoming if he does.

It stomps its little lollipop stick legs ineffectually.

Fumble Message:

It tries to waddle toward you, but its various body segments get disconnected, and it rolls around for a minute collecting them and sticking them back together. (FUMBLE!)

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After Combat

You acquire an item: lollipop stick (20% chance)*

You acquire an item: lollipop stick (20% chance)*

You acquire an item: strawberyl (1% chance)*

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Occurs at The Lollipop Forest.

Notes

The strawberyl will only drop if the advent calendar section for December 5 has been punched.

References

• "Diabeetus" is an idiosyncratic pronunciation associated with Wilford Brimley, celebrity spokesman for the American Diabetes Foundation, who is also noted for his walrus moustache.
• The combat message about "bliskers and blispers" is a reference to the Dr. Seuss book Oh Say Can You Say?.
• The Lollipop Guild are part of the welcoming committee to Munchkin Land for Dorothy in the film of The Wizard of Oz.
• Mastodon are a Heavy Metal band.
• The carpenter is a reference to the Lewis Carroll poem, The Walrus and the Carpenter
• The monster shares its name with an internet meme, probably not due to chance (especially with a bukkit being craftable quite nearby), but the fight text doesn't obviously reference this.