From TheKolWiki
Jump to: navigation, search
Hammockbrogre.gif This content has been retired and is no longer available in game.

As you approach the Grimacite toy factory, you notice a few cosmetic changes. The windows are boarded up, there are red and green radiation hazard symbols all over, and there's one other little thing that you can't quite put your finger on. Oh, right, the giant mutated monstrosity that's exploded out of the roof. That's it. You see Staceydriel Rentacop, the security elf you spoke to before, sitting on a rock with her helmet in her hands.

"Um, you appear to have a nasty case of giant mutant freak, there," you say.

"Don't worry," Staceydriel says, her eyes bright and glassy, "the space marines will be here soon!"

"Ah, good. I didn't even know Loathing had any space marines," you say.

"Oh, yes," she says, smiling blissfully. "Space marines with giant antimatter guns! They'll have kookaburra-proof armor and marshmallow helmets, and they'll ride in on giant mechanical unicorns that run on pure joy! And no little child will ever go hungry again, and everyone will love each other and we'll all eat marmalade straight out of the jar! Ha! Ha ha! Hahahahaha!"

You sneak away as Staceydriel collapses in a paroxysm of insane laughter. Looks like you're going to have to be the space marine you've been waiting for.

Occurred at Sweet Sassafrass, what is that thing?, formerly the site of The Atomic Crimbo Toy Factory.


  • Does not cost an adventure.
  • A one-time adventure.


  • The title of this adventure references the lyrics of the Beatles song "I Am the Walrus"