|Locations||using a figurine of a charred seal|
|Resistance||All damage not caused by a club is reduced to 1.|
|Monster Parts||head, tail, torso|
You light the candle and speak the ancient words. The temperature rises swiftly and with a sizzle, a charred seal appears before you in a whirling eddy of flying cinders. Have you met my cousin Whirling Eddy, by the way? He's a trapeze artist -- a member of the Flying Cinders.
But that's not important right now. What's important is that this seal is coming at you, with a raging fireball balanced on the end of its nose and a look of deep, fiery hatred on the ends of its eyes.
It hurls its fireball at you. Fire bad. Ow! Ouch! Ooh! Ow! Argh! (hot damage)
It smacks you with its hot tail. Normally you're all about some hot tail, but in this case it's pretty painful. Oof! Oof! Ugh! Eek! Ouch! (hot damage)
It bounces its fireball off of your groin, then catches it on its nose again. It'd be pretty impressive if it didn't sting so much. Ouch! Argh! Ow! Ow! Ugh! (hot damage)
It picks you up with its nose and spends a few minutes juggling you. The fact that it's also juggling a massive fireball makes the experience a lot less amusing. Eek! Oof! Oof! Argh! (hot damage)
It tries to hurl its fireball at you, but it drops the ball.
It tries to slap you with a charred fin, but you evade, using your patented Chard Finn technique.
It tries to smack you with its hot tail, but you came here to drink.
It tries to toss its fireball at you, but you make your saving throw.
It falls down and accidentally puts its fireball out. Annoyed, it has to spend a few moments getting another one lit. (FUMBLE!)
|You acquire an item: sizzling seal fat (35% chance)*|
|You acquire an item: Abyssal ember (5% chance)*|
- Summoned with a figurine of a charred seal or (sometimes) depleted uranium seal figurine.
- This monster cannot be copied.
- A saving throw is common in most tabletop wargames and RPGs. The miss message which uses a saving throw would most likely be a reference to either the games Warhammer or D&D, both of which are fantasy games with fireballs.
- "Fire bad" comes from an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, where tainted beer made Buffy and several other college students regress into caveman-like behavior (and intelligence). When asked what she'd learned from her experience, the blonde heroine replied "Fire bad, tree pretty."
- "Fire bad" could also be a reference to the "Napster bad" Metallica cartoon.