Great Wolf of the Air
| Great Wolf of the Air | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 1387 |
| Locations | Dreadsylvanian Woods |
| Hit Points | 5000 |
| Attack | 1200 |
| Defense | 1200 |
| Initiative | ∞ |
| Meat | None |
| Phylum | beast |
| Elements | None |
| Resistance | ? |
| Monster Parts | head, leg, tail, torso |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting the Great Wolf of the AirYou enter the clearing and find it empty, to your great relief. You lay down in the soft grass and stare up at the moon and the stars. It's beautiful. It's... interrupted by a shadow passing in front of the moon.
You stand up for a closer look (but then realize that standing up, although it technically puts your eyes closer to the moon, is probably not going quite far enough to make a difference) and hear a faint beating of wings.
The beating gets closer, in more ways than one, and a giant winged werewolf does that awesome three-point landing thing on the ground in front of you.
He stands up and snarls at you. A driving synthesizer soundtrack begins to play from somewhere.
Hit Message(s):
He kicks you in the <neck> with the force of an AGM-12 Bullpup missile. Ouch! Ouch! Ugh! Ow! Oof! Ow! Ouch! Argh!
He punches you in the <nipple>. It hurts worse than being simultaneously shot with four 50-caliber BMG chain guns.Ooh! Ow! Ouch! Argh! Oof! Ow! Oof! Oof!
He picks you up, flies into the air, and drops you to the ground as though you were a laser-guided Paveway bomb.Argh! Ow! Ouch! Argh! Ow! Ooh! Ouch! Ooh!
A horn section joins the soundtrack and knocks you on your ass with a wall of sound.Ouch! Eek! Eek! Oof! Oof! Ow! Ooh! Ouch!
He grabs you by the neck and demands to know what you've done with his brother. You tell him you've no idea what he's talking about, and he slugs you in the <ear>.Ugh! Argh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ugh! Eek! Ow!
He pounds you with anti-aircraft missiles, just like he's always dreamed of doing to his rival, Cobalt Lightning. It turns out, even if you aren't an aircraft, anti-aircraft missiles still hurt.Eek! Ugh! Ow! Ow! Eek! Argh! Oof! Ouch!
He takes a deep breath, leaps into the air and ascends to his flight ceiling of 100,000 feet. Then he dive bombs you from up there. (CRITICAL HIT!) Ugh! Oof! Argh! Ugh! Ow! Eek! Ugh! Ooh!
He flies away to a nearby cave, and returns munching on a ham sandwich. Guess he had to refuel.
He gets momentarily distracted, thinking about his old friend Twinebuddy Eagle. ...What the heck kind of name is "Twinebuddy"?
He tries to slash you across the <calf> with his claws, but instead just releases some chaff. He must have hit the wrong button.
Instead of attacking you, he pulls a cello from behind a nearby tree and plays a mournful tune. He has a sensitive side!
He fires a bunch of missiles at you, but you release chaff cannisters to confuse their guidance systems. Wait -- where did you get chaff cannisters?
He leaps into the air to attack you, but ends up having to dodge a bunch of anti-air flak instead, because he forgot to turn on his radar jammer first.
He leaps into the air and tries to ascend past 11,000 feet, but can't, because he forgot to take a deep breath first. (FUMBLE!)
The Great Wolf of the Air turns your <face> into confetti with a swipe of his claws.
The Great Wolf of the Air wolfs down your <ankle>.
The Great Wolf of the Air punctures your <skull> with one of his fangs.
The Great Wolf of the Air must be hungry like the wolf, because he chomps on your <skull>.
The Great Wolf of the Air carves a deep gouge across your <thigh> with his claws.
The Great Wolf of the Air scrapes the talon at the end of one wing across your <knee>.
 | An item drops: Great Wolf's headband |
 | An item drops: Great Wolf's right paw |
 | An item drops: Great Wolf's left paw |
 | An item drops: 0-3 Hunger™ Sauce |
| You acquire a clan trophy: |  | Wolf Whistle |
| You gain ??? <substat>. |
Occurs as an outcome of End of the Path in the Dreadsylvanian Woods.
Notes
- This monster cannot be copied.
- Immune to stuns and staggers.
- To defeat this enemy, max out your Damage Absorption at 1000+ and add some Damage Reduction on top of it to survive his initial strike, then recover using a powerful healing item like a vial of scented massage oil or a Dreadsylvanian seed pod. Afterwards he's not that hard.
- The number of bottles of Hunger™ Sauce depends on the total number of kisses across all zones of the Dreadsylvania instance at the time the boss is killed. Exact formula needs spading.
References
- This monster is one big reference to the TV show Airwolf, a show about the crew of a high-tech military helicopter with a distinctive synthesizer soundtrack. "Twinebuddy Eagle" is a reference to the show's protagonist, Stringfellow Hawke, who was looking for his abducted brother. The weapons mentioned in the Great Wolf's attack messages are all part of the specifications of the helicopter from the show.
- The note about his rival "Cobalt Lightning" is most likely a reference to the armed police helicopter "Blue Thunder", from the TV show of the same name.
- The "awesome three-point landing thing" has been compiled.
