Government scientist
| Government scientist | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 1633 |
| Locations | The Secret Government Laboratory |
| Hit Points | 150 |
| Attack | 200 |
| Defense | 200 |
| Initiative | 0 |
| Meat | None |
| Phylum | dude |
| Elements | |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | arm, head, leg, torso |
| Manuel | grimy lab coat |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting a government scientistAs you walk into one of the little laboratories in the building, you see a scientist hunched over a microscope, peering into it intently. You cough to announce your presence, and she spins around. You're relieved to not see madness in her eyes--then less relieved when you see that's because one eye has been replaced with a complex and grotesque array of circuitry. There's plenty of madness in the one remaining eye, actually, now that you look at it. You notice her hair is matted and grimy, and there are curious stains on her lab coat.
She holds a finger up to her lips, which are twitching unpleasantly, and while she does that her other hand grips the microscope and prepares to hurl it at you.
Hit Message(s):
She breaks the top off an Erlenmeyer flask and slashes you with it. Eek! Ooh! Ooh!
She lights a bunsen burner and ignites your <nipple> with it. Ooh! Oof! Ugh! Ouch! Eek! Ugh! Argh! (hot damage)
She pours a bottle of acid on your <kidney>. Ooh! Ugh! Oof!
She swabs you with a deadly pathogen. You vomit profusely. Ooh! Eek! Argh! Ouch! Ugh! Ouch! Ouch!
She whips a broken petri dish at you like a tiny razor-sharp frisbee. Ugh! Oof! Eek!
She whips microscope slides at you like tiny glass shuriken. Yeowch! Ugh! Ouch! Argh!
She opens her mouth in a silent scream. Her dreadlocked hair stands on end and multiple scalpels, shards of broken glass, and various electrical accouterments rise into the air, and hurl themselves at you. (CRITICAL HIT!)
She slashes at you with a broken Erlenmeyer flask, but you dodge.
She tries to burn you with a bunsen burner, but you block with a beaker.
She tries to pour acid on you, but the acid's in a Klein bottle, so it won't come out.
She tries to swab you with a deadly pathogen, but you pathologically refuse to get sick.
She whips a broken petri dish at you, but the amoebae living in there unbalance its flight and she misses.
She gestures to the microscope and to your crotch. You feel like you should be offended, but you laugh it off.
She opens her mouth in a silent scream. The lights in the room start to blink on and off, and all the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. Before she can unleash telekinetic hell, though, she has a coughing fit and has to stop. (FUMBLE!)
 | You gain 23-27 Meat |
 | You acquire an item: experimental serum G-9 (15% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: heavy-duty clipboard (5% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: battery-powered drill (10% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: airborne mutagen (10% chance)* |
- With full Manuel entries:
 | You acquire an item: grimy lab coat (10% chance)* |
Occurs at The Secret Government Laboratory.
Notes
- The battery-powered drill only drops if the 3.14 protocol has been activated at A Mysterious Control Panel
- The airborne mutagen only drops if the 0-0Z-E protocol has been activated at A Mysterious Control Panel
- None of the drops are eligible for heisting
