Government agent
| Government agent | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 1585 |
| Locations | Some Scattered Smoking Debris |
| Hit Points | 75% of Defense |
| Attack | Player's Moxie - 5 (cap at 10000) |
| Defense | Player's Muscle - 5 (cap at 10000) |
| Initiative | 25 |
| Meat | 60-90 |
| Phylum | dude |
| Elements | None |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | arm, head, leg, torso |
| Quest | burned government manual fragment |
| Manuel | government-issue identification badge |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting a Government agentA government man runs up to you as you approach the ship, giving the international sign for "Get out of here," which is to point a gun at you and start firing it.
Hit Message(s):
He speaks into the cuff of his shirt. A plane flies by overhead and drops a grenade on you, with explosive results. Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! Ouch!
He pulls out an official government taser and officially tases you in the <thigh>. Oof! Ow! Eek! Eek!
He oppresses you. I mean, you're used to the government oppressing you, but this is definitely a more up-close and personal type. Ooh! Ooh! Argh! Oof!
He shoots you with his firearm, lighting your arm on fire. Argh! Oof! Ooh! Argh!
He shoots you in the side of the arm with his government-issued sidearm. Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Oof!
He pulls off his sunglasses and delivers a pun so bad it hurts. Ouch! Ow! Ooh! Ooh!
He shoots you with his government-issued gun. Due to red tape and bureaucratic waste, the bullets cost 500 meat apiece! Ugh! Ooh! Eek! Ow!
He shoots at you with his firearm, but failed to calibrate his sights per government regulation, and misses.
He shoots at you with his sidearm, but fails to hit even the side of your arm.
He wants to shoot you with his government-issued gun, but doesn't want to have to file the paperwork that would ensue.
He pulls off his sunglasses and delivers a bad pun, but something about being in the Kingdom makes you less annoyed by puns.
He tries to tase you in the throat but can't, bro.
He tries to oppress you, but isn't enough of a criminal government agent to do it.
He sees an alien go sprinting off in the fog, and chases after it to interrogate it. (FUMBLE!)
 | You gain 60-90 Meat. (average: 75, stdev: 6.52)* |
 | You acquire an item: burned government manual fragment (15% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: government cheese (20% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: government-issued night-vision goggles (3% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: pair of government shades (3% chance)* |
Occurs at Some Scattered Smoking Debris.
Notes
- Portscan causes this monster to be the next encounter, with the following introduction text:
- A government man runs up to you, giving the international sign for "Get out of here," which is to point a gun at you and start firing it.
