Going Postal

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Description

Gnorbert, the Elder Gnomad, wants you to retrieve some comic books from a sk8 gnome named Gn8than, who usually hangs out at The eXtreme Slope.

Tasks

Text

Initial Visit:

Ah, an Adventurer! Come closer, yougng one, I have a proposal that may interest you.

I seek a messegnger to make contact with our brother, Gn8than the Sk8 Gnome. He cagn usually be found on the eXtreme Slope. Even though he has shamed his family and his tribe by deserting the desert, we still wagnt to get in touch with him. For, though he is agn outcast, he borrowed our brother Chomsky's comic books and gnever returned them. If you bring the comics to me, I will reward you with a valuable piece of Gnomish technology that our Supertinker has developed, which will undoubtedly come in hagndy during your travels.

Subsequent Visits:

Hello agaign, Advegnturer. Have you had any success in locating our brother Chomsky's comic books? You are not ugnder any pressure to hurry, but gnaturally I cannot reward you until your task is completed.

Upon returning with Chomsky's comic books:

Ah, I see you have retrieved Chomsky's comic books from that gne'er-do-well, Gn8than. Now we can never speak of him again. Here is the reward I promised: a Gnomitronic Hyperspatial Demodulizer. I didn't fully understagnd when Gnorman attempted to explain it to me, but as far as I could make out, it emits a burst of electricity at such a frequency that, if used to deliver the fignal blow to a monster, it somehow cognverts and redirects the monster's life-force to energize the user. The things that Gnorman comes up with, I tell you.

Anyway, here it is. Of course, you'll be gneeding the batteries too, and there's agnother little task I have for you. You see, ancient Gnomish legends tell of forty-eight mystical crystals, each attuned to one of the fugndamental elements of creation -- fire, water, doorknobs, and so forth -- and when collected, these crystals will reveal the location of the seventy-gnine lost fragments of a map which -- ow! What are you doing? Let go of my ear! Ow! All right, fine, here, take the batteries!

Sheesh, Adventurers these days...

Gizmo.gifYou acquire an item: Gnomitronic Hyperspatial Demodulizer

Notes

  • This quest can only be undertaken if you have ascended under a moxie sign.
  • The Hippy trade cannot be completed during the Mysterious Island Quest.
  • The Hippy trade cannot be completed if you are in the Hippy Disguise.
  • The Lihc trade cannot be completed if you have not completed the Undefile the Cyrpt Quest.
  • Because the Protagonist trade cannot be completed before beginning the Giant Trash Quest, your level must be at least 10 to complete this quest.
  • Despite Jick's dislike for the number 13, there are 13 items needed to finish this quest.
  • Each task normally takes one turn, but can be overridden by Semi-Rare Adventures, Feast of Boris monsters, or assassins sent by your Nemesis.
  • In total, this quest takes exactly 25 adventures, not including overridden ones.

References

  • "Brother Chomsky" is a reference to Noam Chomsky, noted writer, philosopher, theoretical linguist and activist.
  • The trade sequence, as well as your first item being a red paperclip, is a reference to the one red paperclip trade, where a man traded a red paperclip for better and better things, ending with a house.
  • The title "Going Postal" references the fact that this quest is a parody of delivery or "Fed Ex" quests.