Getting Tired
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There are some vague or non-exact figures and information on this page. Some spading is required.
The notes below also indicate that the number of tires (X) you use to calculate hobo kills both does and does not include the tire that sets off the avalanche. Which is it? |
As you're strolling down Burnbarrel Blvd., you look to your right, and see a discarded tire lying on the ground. Then you look to your left, and see an immense pile of burning tires. Then you look within yourself, and a plan forms.
How would you like to enact that plan?
| Toss the tire on the fire violently |
- If you've already added a tire to the fire gently:
You hurl the tire with all of your might, trying to make it to the top of the tire pile. You don't quite make it, and your tire bounces harmlessly off the side of the pile.
Or perhaps... not so harmlessly after all. A great rumbling slowly builds as the immense pile shifts and shudders, and all at once a great tirevalanche (it's like an avalanche, but with flaming tires, in case you were wondering) pours down the side of the pile.
X flaming tires fly in X different directions, bowling down hapless hobos as they roll.
- If you have not added a tire to the fire gently:
You hurl the tire with all of your might. It hits the stack, catches fire, bounces off, and goes rolling down Burnbarrel Blvd., where it mows down an unsuspecting hobo on his way from one burning building to another.
| Toss the tire on the fire gently |
- First 48 tires:
You carefully prop the tire up on the burning stack. Due to the ringlike shape of the tire, the flames rise higher.
- 49th tire:
You pick up the tire, and it turns out to be already sort of on fire!
You hurl the tire with all of your might, trying to make it to the top of the tire pile. You don't quite make it, and your tire bounces harmlessly off the side of the pile.
Or perhaps... not so harmlessly after all. A great rumbling slowly builds as the immense pile shifts and shudders, and all at once a great tirevalanche (it's like an avalanche, but with flaming tires, in case you were wondering) pours down the side of the pile.
49 flaming tires fly in 49 different directions, bowling down hapless hobos as they roll.
| Leave the tire alone |
You rotate (nearly losing your balance) and leave the tire behind.
Occurs at Burnbarrel Blvd.
Notes
- When you throw a tire violently, after adding some gently, X is equal to the number of tires you have stacked gently. It does not include the one that you are throwing violently.
- As the number of stacked tires increases, the probability of receiving this noncombat adventure decreases significantly; other noncombats will continue to occur at the normal rate.
- You can have at most 48 tires on fire at a time. Gently throwing the 49th tire immediately starts a tire-avalanche.
- Throwing a tire on violently (or adding a 49th tire) kills (X2*0.1)+(0.7*X) hobos, where X is the number of tires that have been gently added since the last tire-avalanche. It also increases the damage done by the special moves of hot hobos.
- Leaving the tire alone banishes the adventure for 10 turns.
References
- The text about the flames growing higher due to the tires' ringlike shape is a reference to the song Ring of Fire.
- Possible reference to the Springfield Tire Fire in The Simpsons.
- The name of the adventure "Getting Tired" may also reference to the the "Confucius Says" joke that reads "Confucius says: Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who runs behind car gets exhausted."
