Deck of Every Card (adventure)

From TheKolWiki
Jump to: navigation, search

Deck of Every Card

Below are the possible results of drawing a card. For a concise list of results, see Deck of Every Card (Effects Table).

Cardback.gif Cardfront.gif
Draw a card

Cardfront.gif
6
Club.gif Club.gif
Club.gif Club.gif
Club.gif Club.gif
6

You draw a card: X of Clubs

You feel a tap on your shoulder.

Turn Around
You turn around just in time to see some jerk throw a bunch of clubs at you. What a jerk, that jerk is!
Club.gifYou acquire X seal-clubbing clubs
You gain 3 PvP Fights.

Cardfront.gif
2
Baconstone.gif
Baconstone.gif
2

You draw a card: X of Diamonds

You notice a small velvet bag on the ground at your feet.

Grab It
You open the bag. It's full of diamonds! Wait, no, not diamonds. Fake diamonds.
Baconstone.gifYou acquire X hyper-cubic zirconiae

Cardfront.gif
8
Cartoonheart.gif Cartoonheart.gif
Cartoonheart.gif
Cartoonheart.gif Cartoonheart.gif
Cartoonheart.gif
Cartoonheart.gif Cartoonheart.gif
8

You draw a card: X of Hearts

The hearts on the card look weird and puffy.

Look closer...
You discover that the hearts are made of bubblegum. You peel them off and stick them in your sack.
Cartoonheart.gifYou acquire X bubblegum hearts

Cardfront.gif
10
Shovel.gif Shovel.gif
Shovel.gif Shovel.gif
Shovel.gif Shovel.gif
Shovel.gif Shovel.gif
Shovel.gif Shovel.gif
10

You draw a card: X of Spades

You notice a stack of shovels on the ground in front of a nearby stack of tombstones.

Grab Them
You grab the shovels. There's something written on the ground under the shovels: <X letter string>
Shovel.gifYou acquire X grave robbing shovels

(See Deck of Every Card spades puzzle for details)


Cardfront.gif
3
Papaya.gif
Papaya.gif
Papaya.gif
3

You draw a card: X of Papayas

You look down and see a pile of papayas. A pa-pile-a, if you will.

Grab 'em!
You pa-pick up the papayas and shove them into your pa-pack.
Papaya.gifYou acquire X papayas

Cardfront.gif
7
Kumquat.gif Kumquat.gif
Kumquat.gif
Kumquat.gif Kumquat.gif
Kumquat.gif Kumquat.gif
7

You draw a card: X of Kumquats

Kumquats! Kumquats everywhere!

Scoop them up!

You scoop up all the kumquats.

Kumquat.gifYou acquire X kumquats

Cardfront.gif
8
Salad.gif Salad.gif
Salad.gif
Salad.gif Salad.gif
Salad.gif
Salad.gif Salad.gif
8

You draw a card: X of Salads

You look down and see something hilarious.

Ha! Ha ha ha!
You laugh and laugh and laugh.
Salad.gifYou acquire X bowls of delicious salad

Cardfront.gif
2
Goldcoin.gif
Goldcoin.gif
2

You draw a card: X of Coins

Oh, huh -- the coins are actually real coins, stuck to the card!

Nice!
You pry off the coins and shove them into your coin purse. Which you have. Because you are 900 years old.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire X valuable coins

Cardfront.gif
4
Coffeecup.gif Coffeecup.gif
Coffeecup.gif Coffeecup.gif
4

You draw a card: X of Cups

The cups on the card seem... oddly three-dimensional.

Investigate

To your astonishment, you find that the cups are real. And to your delight, you find that they are full of booze!
You acquire X random booze items


Cardfront.gif
5
Nicesword.gif Nicesword.gif
Nicesword.gif
Nicesword.gif Nicesword.gif
5

You draw a card: X of Swords

My God. It's full of swords.

Sweet!

You grab the swords off of the card before it occurs to you that they're not actually real swords.
You acquire X random swords


Cardfront.gif
3
Wand.gif
Wand.gif
Wand.gif
3

You draw a card: X of Wands

The wands on the card twinkle and you notice that they're all pointed at you.

Uh oh...

The wands all fire at once, enchanting the crap out of you.
You acquire 5 turns of X random effects


Cardfront.gif
0 - The Fool
Clown.gif

You draw a card: 0 - The Fool

A silly fool dances foolishly on the card.

Watch him dance!
You watch the fool dance for a while, and it turns out that when he dances, the whole world dances with him. At least the part of the world that contains you.
Dance2.gifYou acquire an effect: Dancin' Fool
(duration: 20 Adventures)

Cardfront.gif
I - The Magician
Fernswarthy.gif

You draw a card: I - The Magician

A canny-looking magician glares at you wryly from the card.

Glare right back at him.
You lock eyes with the magician and feel your brain fill up with magic.
Snowflakes.gifYou acquire an effect: Magicianship
(duration: 20 Adventures)

Cardfront.gif
II - The High Priestess
Warhipc2.gif

You draw a card: II - The High Priestess

How did her eyes get so red?

Who knows!

Fight a random hippy


Cardfront.gif
III - The Empress
Twins ginger.gif

You draw a card: III - The Empress

This card depicts a crazy-looking woman holding a crazy-looking book (not pictured).

Read Her Book
You flip through the Empress's book. It turns out to be a book of magic tricks!
You gain 500 Mysteriousness.

Cardfront.gif
IV - The Emperor
Runningman.gif

You draw a card: IV - The Emperor

This card just has a naked dude on it...

Turn Away
The Emperor This monster is a Dude -- (edit metadata)
Theemperor.gif
  • Item Drops: The Emperor's dry cleaning
  • Meat Drop: None
  • Monster Level: 100 • Substat Gain: 25 • Moxie for No Hit*: 110
  • Monster Defense: 100
  • Hit Points: 100
  • Initiative: 100
  • Elemental Alignment: None
  • Damage Resistance: ?

Cardfront.gif
V - The Hierophant
Warehouseclerk.gif

You draw a card: V - The Hierophant

What is a hierophant, anyway. Just some dude?

Probably just some dude

Fight a random dude


Cardfront.gif
VI - The Lovers
Kok lovers.gif

You draw a card: VI - The Lovers

This card depicts two attractive people gazing lovingly into each others' eyes.

Gaze along with them
Dang. Those two are nasty.
You gain 500 Cheek.

Cardfront.gif
VII - The Chariot
Carriage.gif

You draw a card: VII - The Chariot

What a confusing contrivance this conveyance is.

Contemptible.

Fight a random Construct


Cardfront.gif
IX - The Hermit
Hermit.gif

You draw a card: IX - The Hermit

Look at that guy. So smug. So sure he can't be killed.

You'll show him
Hermit This monster is a Dude -- (edit metadata)
Hermit.gif
  • Item Drops: hermit factoid
  • Meat Drop: None
  • Monster Level: 100 • Substat Gain: 25 • Moxie for No Hit*: 110
  • Monster Defense: 100
  • Hit Points: 100
  • Initiative: 100
  • Elemental Alignment: None

Cardfront.gif
X - The Wheel of Fortune
Chorewheel.gif

You draw a card: X - The Wheel of Fortune

This card has a little wheel pinned to the center of it.

Spin it.
You spin the wheel and it clicks to a stop on a space marked 'Fortune.'
Cavewheel.gifYou acquire an effect: Fortune of the Wheel
(duration: 20 Adventures)

Cardfront.gif
XI - Strength
Thegym.gif

You draw a card: XI - Strength

You almost feel like you could walk right into the tiny gym on this card...

Feel the burn!
You imagine yourself going inside the tiny gym and being made to feel self-conscious by a bunch of shirtless muscle-bros.
Barbell.gifYou acquire an effect: Strongly Motivated
(duration: 20 Adventures)

Cardfront.gif
XII - The Hanged Man
Chad.gif

You draw a card: XII - The Hanged Man

Ugh. This guy.

Ridiculous.

Fight a random Orc


Cardfront.gif
XIII - Death
Reaper.gif

You draw a card: XIII - Death

The reaper regards you dispassionately from the center of the card.

Gaze into his eyes...

Fight a random Undead


Cardfront.gif
XIV - Temperance
Hobo.gif

You draw a card: XIV - Temperance

I guess this must be a card from the Ironic Tarot.

Don't you think?

Fight a random hobo


Cardfront.gif
XV - The Devil
Spelunkdevil.gif

You draw a card: XV - The Devil

The greatest trick The Devil ever pulled was appearing on this card.

And for his next trick...

Fight a random demon


Cardfront.gif
XVI - The Tower
Tower adv.gif

You draw a card: XVI - The Tower

That tower looks familiar...

Take a closer look.
You take a shower, then you shake the tower until a key falls out.
Keya.gifYou acquire an item: Boris's key
or
Keyb.gifYou acquire an item: Jarlsberg's key
or
Keyc.gifYou acquire an item: Sneaky Pete's key

Cardfront.gif
XVII - The Star
Goldstar.gif

You draw a card: XVII - The Star

Oh, hey, a star.

Wish upon it.

Fight a random constellation


Cardfront.gif
XVIII - The Moon
Moon8.gif

You draw a card: XVIII - The Moon

Ugh. Space. Who needs it. It's just all full of horrors!

Horrors, I tell ya.

Fight a random horror


Cardfront.gif
XXI - The World
Globe.gif

You draw a card: XXI - The World

This card has the whole world on it!

Pick it up.
You sit there for a minute imagining that you are Atlas. Then you shrug it off.
You gain 500 Muscleboundness.

Cardfront.gif
Plains
Plains4.gif

Land

Tap: Add one white mana to your mana pool.

You draw a card: Plains

This card has a picture of some plains on it.

Tap It
You twist the card to the right and a weird little coin thing pops out.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: white mana

Cardfront.gif
Swamp
Swampy.gif

Land

Tap: Add one black mana to your mana pool.

You draw a card: Swamp

This card has a picture of a swamp on it.

Tap It
You twist the card to the right and a weird little coin thing pops out.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: black mana

Cardfront.gif
Mountain
Fudgemountain.gif

Land

Tap: Add one red mana to your mana pool.

You draw a card: Mountain

This card has a picture of a mountain on it.

Tap It
You twist the card to the right and a weird little coin thing pops out.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: red mana

Cardfront.gif
Forest
Hedgerow.gif

Land

Tap: Add one green mana to your mana pool.

You draw a card: Forest

This card has a picture of a forest on it.

Tap It
You twist the card to the right and a weird little coin thing pops out.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: green mana

Cardfront.gif
Island
Oasis.gif

Land

Tap: Add one blue mana to your mana pool.

You draw a card: Island

This card has a picture of an island on it.

Tap It
You twist the card to the right and a weird little coin thing pops out.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: blue mana

Cardfront.gif
Healing Salve (W)
Claypot.gif

Instant

Gain 3 life.

You draw a card: Healing Salve

This card looks like it contains a magic spell of some kind.

Memorize It
You memorize the spell. It doesn't take very long.
You acquire a skill: Potion4.gif Healing Salve
Or, if you already know the skill:
You already know this spell, so you just tear off the top right corner of the card and shove it in your pocket.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: white mana

Cardfront.gif
Dark Ritual (B)
Dodecagram2.gif

Instant

Add 3 black mana to your mana pool.

You draw a card: Dark Ritual

This card looks like it contains a magic spell of some kind.

Memorize It
You memorize the spell. It doesn't take very long.
You acquire a skill: Skull.gif Dark Ritual
Or, if you already know the skill:
You already know this spell, so you just tear off the top right corner of the card and shove it in your pocket.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: black mana

Cardfront.gif
Lightning Bolt R
Cloudstrike.gif

Instant

Deal 3 damage

You draw a card: Lightning Bolt

This card looks like it contains a super powerful magic spell of some kind.

Memorize It
You memorize the spell. It doesn't take very long.
You acquire a skill: Lightning.gif Lightning Bolt
Or, if you already know the skill:
You already know this spell, so you just tear off the top right corner of the card and shove it in your pocket.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: red mana

Cardfront.gif
Giant Growth (G)
Rat.gif

Instant

Target creature gains +3/+3 until end of turn.

You draw a card: Giant Growth

This card looks like it contains a magic spell of some kind.

Memorize It
You memorize the spell. It doesn't take very long.
You acquire a skill: Smilerat.gif Giant Growth
Or, if you already know the skill:
You already know this spell, so you just tear off the top right corner of the card and shove it in your pocket.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: green mana

Cardfront.gif
Ancestral Recall (L)
River2.gif

Instant

Draw 3 cards.

You draw a card: Ancestral Recall

This card looks like it contains a magic spell of some kind.

Memorize it
You memorize the spell. It doesn't take very long.
You acquire a skill: Raindrop.gif Ancestral Recall
Or, if you already know the skill:
You already know this spell, so you just tear off the top right corner of the card and shove it in your pocket.
Goldcoin.gifYou acquire an item: blue mana

Cardfront.gif
The Hive (5)
Beehive-adventure.gif

(5)(T): Put a 1/1 colorless Insect artifact creature token with flying named Wasp onto the battlefield.
Illus. Sandra Everingham

You draw a card: The Hive

The hive on this card buzzes in much the same way a real hive buzzes.

Poke it with a stick

Fight a random Bug


Cardfront.gif
3
Kg haremguard.gif

Has +4 Attack while your opponent has 6 or more cards in hand.

24

You draw a card: Goblin Sapper

This card depicts an untrustworthy goblin. Which is to say... a goblin.

Fail to trust him.

Fight a random goblin


Cardfront.gif
6
Firebat.gif

Fire Elemental

Battlecry: Deal 3 damage.

65

You draw a card: Fire Elemental


Play the Card

Fight a random elemental


Cardfront.gif
2
Spiralbig.gif

Unstable Portal

Add a random minion to your hand. It costs (3) less.

You draw a card: Unstable Portal

You wonder what's inside...

Find out!

Fight a random Weird


Cardfront.gif
Lead Pipe
Leadpipe.gif

You draw a card: Lead Pipe

This card has a lead pipe on it, and also the words 'Lead Pipe.'

Look Closer.
You look under the card and find an actual weapon!
Leadpipe.gifYou acquire an item: lead pipe

Cardfront.gif
Rope
Lasso.gif

You draw a card: Rope

This card has a rope on it. Er, a picture of a rope, I guess.

Look closer
You look under the card and find an actual weapon!
Lasso.gifYou acquire an item: rope

Cardfront.gif
Wrench
Monkeywrench.gif

You draw a card: Wrench

This card has a picture of a wrench on it.

Look Closer.
You look under the card and find an actual weapon!
Monkeywrench.gifYou acquire an item: wrench

Cardfront.gif
Candlestick
Candlestick.gif

You draw a card: Candlestick

This card has a picture of a candlestick on it.

Look Closer.
You look under the card and find an actual weapon!
Candlestick.gifYou acquire an item: candlestick

Cardfront.gif
Knife
Colaknife.gif

You draw a card: Knife

That's not a knife -- it's a card with a picture of a knife on it.

Look closer
You look under the card and find an actual weapon!
Colaknife.gifYou acquire an item: knife

Cardfront.gif
Revolver
Sixshooter.gif

You draw a card: Revolver

You rotate the card to reveal a revolver. Ha ha.

Look Closer
You look under the card and find an actual weapon!
Sixshooter.gifYou acquire an item: revolver

Cardfront.gif
Professor Plum
Drawkward.gif

You draw a card: Professor Plum

Wait... This guy looks familiar...

Check inside his coat for weapons.
You check inside Professor Plum's coat -- turns out he's smuggling plums!
Plum.gifYou acquire 10 plums

Cardfront.gif
Spare Tire
Tire.gif

You draw a card: Spare Tire

You should really start paying more attention to your diet, ha ha ha.

Look Closer.
You take the card to a weird store where you can trade cards for the objects depicted on them, as long as those objects are a tire. It is a really weird store.
Tire.gifYou acquire an item: tires

Cardfront.gif
Extra Tank
Tank.gif

You draw a card: Extra Tank

This card has a picture of a gas tank on it.

Look Closer.
You trick a one-eyed gnoll into trading you a real fuel tank for a picture of a fuel tank. He doesn't have any depth perception you see.
Tank.gifYou acquire an item: full meat tank

Cardfront.gif
Sheep
Stone sheep.gif

You draw a card: Sheep

This card depicting a sheep fills you with shear joy.

Ugh.
Turns out the sheep is scratch-and-sniff, and when you scratch it some wool comes loose.
Stonewool.gifYou acquire 3 handfuls of stone wool

Cardfront.gif
Year of Plenty
DinnerEncounter.gif

Take any 2 resources from the bank. Add them to your hand. They can be 2 of the same resource or 2 different resources.

You draw a card: Year of Plenty

Two resources! You can live like a king!

Do it. Live like a King.

The card inspires you to see what you've got lying around the kitchen and whip up a feast of your own.
You acquire 5 random food items


Cardfront.gif
MINE
Mineshaft.gif

Trash a Treasure card from your hand. Gain a Treasure card costing up to (3) more; put it in your hand.

(5) ACTION

You draw a card: Mine

This seems really complicated and boring...

Oh well. See what's inside the mine.
You reach into the paper mineshaft and grab all the ore you can fit in one hand.
Lore.gifYou acquire an item: linoleum ore
Aore.gifYou acquire an item: asbestos ore
Core.gifYou acquire an item: chrome ore

Cardfront.gif
LABORATORY
Still.gif

+2 Cards
+1 Action




(5) ACTION

You draw a card: Laboratory

Oh good, you're always on the lookout for some action.

Get it.

You grab a few pictures of potions off of the picture of an alchemist's desk.
You acquire 5 random potions


Cardfront.gif
Werewolf.gif
WEREWOLF

You draw a card: Werewolf

This card depicts a savage beast. Good thing it's just a picture, and not really here...

Or isn't it?

Fight a random beast


Cardfront.gif
GO FISH

You draw a card: Go Fish

You are almost certain that there's no such card as this.

Oh well. Go fish anyway.

Fight a random Fish


Cardfront.gif
Get Well Soon!
Dv seedpod.gif Dv seedpod.gif
Dv seedpod.gif Dv seedpod.gif
Dv seedpod.gif Dv seedpod.gif
Dv seedpod.gif Dv seedpod.gif
Dv seedpod.gif Dv seedpod.gif

You draw a card: Plantable Greeting Card

This is one of those greeting cards with seeds woven into the recycled paper it's made out of.

Cool. Plant it.

Fight a random plant


Cardfront.gif
Happy Birthday!
Pirate1.gif

To my favorite Pieces of 8-Year-Old Nephew!

You draw a card: Pirate Birthday Card

That joke doesn't even make any sense!

Ugh. The worst!

Fight a random pirate


Cardfront.gif
Elf raconteur.gif

Merry Christmas, Walter!

You draw a card: Christmas Card

Huh. You didn't even know they made name-specific Christmas cards.

Also, what's Christmas?

Fight a random elf


Cardfront.gif
Gift Card
Present.gif

You draw a card: Gift Card

Hmm. Kinda... nonspecific.

Oh well.
You shove the gift card in your pocket.
Buscard.gifYou acquire an item: gift card

Cardfront.gif
Fancy Suit
Warehouse
Peng ent.gif

10% Discount Card

You draw a card: Suit Warehouse Discount Card

You've been meaning to get a new suit.

Grab the card

Fight a random penguin


Cardfront.gif
Mickey Mantle

You draw a card: 1952 Mickey Mantle

You flip over the top card, which turns out to be an incredibly valuable baseball card!

Woah!
You look around to make sure nobody's watching, then you pocket the card.
Tradecard.gifYou acquire an item: 1952 Mickey Mantle card

Cardfront.gif
Slimer.gif

THE RETURN OF SLIMER

You draw a card: Slimer Trading Card

Yuck, what a gross ghost. A ghrost.

So slimy

Fight a random slime


Cardfront.gif
Aquarius
Merkinposeur.gif

Abandon hope for future plans...

You draw a card: Aquarius Horoscope

That's pretty depressing, as horoscopes go.

Oh well. Abandon away.

Fight a random Mer-Kin


Cardfront.gif
Handymanjay.gif

You draw a card: Hunky Fireman Card

This fireman doesn't look quite human.

Look more closely.

Fight a random humanoid


Cardfront.gif
Green Card

Good for one (1) citizenship.

You draw a card: Green Card

Whoah, hey -- you've heard these things are really hard to get!

Grab It!
legal alien This monster is a Humanoid -- (edit metadata)
Illegal alien.gif
  • Item Drops: ?
  • Meat Drop: None
  • Monster Level: 50 • Substat Gain: 12.5 • Moxie for No Hit*: 60
  • Monster Defense: 50
  • Hit Points: 100
  • Initiative: 50
  • Elemental Alignment: None
  • Damage Resistance: ?

Cardfront.gif
RACE

You draw a card: The Race Card

Huh. You didn't think this was a literal card.

Read it more closely.
You read the card. 'RACE,' it says. 'Okay,' you reply.
Fast.gifYou acquire an effect: Racing!
(duration: 20 Adventures)

Occurs when drawing a card or using gift card.

References

  • The first two sets of cards are references to the Minor and Major Arcana of Tarot cards.
  • The next two sets are, respectively, the basic lands and the "Boon Cycle" cards of Magic: the Gathering. The Hive is also a Magic card.
  • The Goblin Sapper, Fire Elemental, and Unstable Portal cards are references to Hearthstone: Heroes of Warcraft.
  • The six weapons and Professor Plum are from Cluedo, known as Clue in North America.
  • Sheep and Year of Plenty are from The Settlers of Catan.
  • Mine and Laboratory are from Dominion, another card game.
  • The Spare Tire and Extra Tank are from Mille Bornes.
  • The Werewolf is from the card game also known as Werewolf (or mafia, but in that case the card would say 'Mafia'). It has been published by many companies under many names, but can also be played with a regular deck of cards, or even without any cards at all. The cardless variety is incredibly popular online.
  • The Go Fish card is a reference to the game Go Fish, and no, it doesn't actually contain a "Go Fish" card.
  • A green card refers to two different pieces of U.S. documentation, which both relate to the legal residency status of immigrants.
  • The race card is a rhetorical device whereby you attempt to diffuse an opponent's argument by accusing them of racism.