Deadwood tree
| Deadwood tree | |
|---|---|
| Monster ID | 864 |
| Locations | The Shivering Timbers |
| Hit Points | Scales with player stats |
| Attack | Scales with player stats |
| Defense | Scales with player stats |
| Initiative | 0 |
| Meat | None |
| Phylum | plant |
| Elements | None |
| Resistance | None |
| Monster Parts | limb, trunk, twig |
| Manuel Entry | |
| refreshedit data | |
You're fighting a deadwood treeWoah, this seems to be some kind of zombie tree. It's dead and rotting, with nary a leaf, but it's lurching around just like live trees don't.
Instead of "brrrraaains," it seems to be muttering about sucking on chickens. I'm not sure why.
Hit Message(s):
You notice some chunks of gold in a nearby creek, and as you bend over to pan it, the tree hits you in the back of the head with a shovel. Ugh! Argh!
It smacks you in the throat with a heavy branch. Some ancient Italian maxim fits this situation, but its particulars escape you. Eek! Ow! Ouch!
It hits you on the head with a chamber pot. And if you don't know what one of those is, the Adventurer in the campsite next to yours would appreciate you finding out. Ouch! Argh! Eek!
It orders one of its cronies to sneak up behind you and stab you in the back. Then it orders a different cronie to stab the first cronie. Ouch! Ouch!
It rips off your <eye> and feeds it to some pigs owned by a Chinese guy. Man. You really hate it when your <face> gets eaten by Chinese pigs. Ouch! Ugh! Ooh! Argh!
It tries to threaten you, but its sentence is so complex and difficult to parse that you don't actually perceive the threat.
It sets political machinations in motion that will eventually result in you getting beaten up. Eventually.
It wishes it could hit you over the head, rob you, and throw your body in the creek, but alas, it cannot.
It unleashes a stream of profanity so dense that you have trouble understanding it. And what you don't understand can't hurt you.
It lurches at you with a knife, but you take a couple of steps backward out of its reach. Enraged, it spends the next five minutes cursing like a sailor with Tourette's syndrome who just slammed a door on his hand. (FUMBLE!)
 | You acquire an item: spooky bark (10% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: spooky sap (5% chance)* |
 | You acquire an item: petrified wood (5% chance)* |
| You gain some <substat>. |
Occurs at The Shivering Timbers.
References
- Much of the combat text reference the television series Deadwood.
- The line about "sucking on chickens" instead of "brrrraaains" is probably a semi-oblique reference to the word "cocksucker," an expletive favored by the cast of Deadwood.
- "Brains" are standard zombie fare in Return of the Living Dead
