CBC Radio
From TheKolWiki
| CBC Radio |
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Contents
Notes
- CBC Radio is a chat NPC, with playerid -111 that chats on the /crimbo chat channel.
- Clicking on the player name displays the above message; there is no player profile.
- On minutes ending in 1, provides a status update for one of the two combat zones presently available at Crimbo Town 2023.
- The message is based on which army is winning in that zone based on total warfare effectiveness.
- An additional message is displayed when a zone has been conquered and a different location changes to combat.
- CBC radio also announces when a player has used a Crimbuccaneer invasion map or Elf Guard strategic map, as well as announcing when those effects end.
- Its name is highlighted in random Crimbo colors similar to So Much Holiday Fun!, although messages themselves are unaffected.
Messages
Plans
- The elves have reworked their plans, and the comprehensive invasion plan is no longer yielding additional plunder.
- [PlayerName] has developed a comprehensive invasion plan, ensuring maximum booty for all those fighting the elves.
- The pirates have changed their strategy, and the strategic plan is no longer yielding additional rewards.
- [PlayerName] has developed a strategic plan, ensuring maximum monetary plunder for all those fighting the pirates.
Zone Changes
- Not even Abeula's space is sacred, battle has consumed her cottage.
- What started as a mild skirmish has erupted into a battle around Abuela's cottage.
- The elves have taken over Abuela's cottage!
- The pirates now control Abuela's cottage.
- Crimbuccaneer and elves have started brawling in the cafe, orders are temporarily on hold.
- Due to an argument over tipping customs, the cafe is now at war.
- Get your fill of sugar now, the elves just took over the cafe.
- The cafe is now under controlled[sic] and manager[sic] by the crimbuccaneers.
- New happy hour special at the bar - 2 warring factions for the price of 1!
- Nobody is getting any grog or nog because that area has been consumed by battle.
- The bar area has been overrun by battle.
- Go get some nog, the Elves have captured the bar area!
- Arrrr, get ye some grog at the bar area that the crimbuccaneers just took over.
- The armory area is now behind the frontlines.
- It's going to be more difficult to collect the weapons of war because war has come to the armory.
- The elves now control the armory.
- The pirates have seized control of the armory.
- The battle lines have overtaken the factory area.
- The factory area is now a war zone.
- War has seized the means of production (the factory).
- Go build some toys, the elves control the factory.
- The factory has fallen under pirate control.
Abuela's Cottage (Contested)
- Around Abuela's cottage, you hear a mix of caroling and pleas for reinforcement as the elves represent [X]% of the local forces.
- The elves are barely holding onto [X]% of the ground around Abuela's cottage.
- With only [X]% of Abuela's cottage controlled, the elves will need support to maintain control.
- With a slight lead in the battle around Abuela's cottage, the elves have painted [X]% of the walls red and green.
- Asserting their control, the elves have pushed out swathes of crimbuccaneers and represent [X]% of the cottage population.
- Over [X]% of the combatants around Abuela are elves or elf-friendlies.
- The pirates are being pushed back, as the elves control [X]% of Abuela's cottage windows.
- On a scale of Jolly to Cool, the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] have just turned Abuela's cottage [X]% cool!
- The pirates barely control Abeula's cottage with [X]% of the territory in hand.
- The [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] barely control Abeula's cottage with [X]% of the territory in hand.
- Cutlasses and hooks abound as the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] represent [X]% of the population near Abuela's cottage.
- Avast lolly-gagging! The [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] control only [X]% of Abuela's cottage!
- Pirate cheese[sic] of "Sammy, Sammy" outweigh elven cheers for "Tammy" by [X]% around Abuela's cottage.
A Cafe Divided
- The elves are taking over the pantry at the cafe and have dumped [X]% of the cured meats and hard tack.
- With the elves taking control, [X]% of the cafe items now contain nutmeg.
- Over [X]% of the cafe tables now bear an "elf seating only" sign.
- [X]% of the cafe is blocked off in a section labeled, "elves only."
- The scents of gingerbread and shortbread fill the cafe, as the elves dedicate [X]% of ovens to those flavors.
- [X]% of the waitstaff at the cafe are wearing eyepatches to fit in with their pirate managers.
- [X]% of the nutmeg from the cafe kitchen is being burned by a group of pirates out back.
- With some slight headway at the cafe, the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] have dumped out [X]% of the syrup supply.
- You know the pirates are firmly in control of the cafe because [X]% of the mene[sic] is suitable for 6 months of storage.
- To advanced[sic] their lead, the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] have redecorated [X]% of the cafe in a skull and crossbones motif.
- Under pirate management, all the cafe staff's uniforms are [X]% covered in pieces of flarrrre.
- Under pirate rule, [X]% of cafe patrons are wearing eyepatches and peglegs to pass.
The Armory Up In Arms
- [X]% of the forces around the armory are currently elves.
- "Make candy, not war," chant the elves around the armory while producing [X]% elf guard gear.
- The elves are barely holding onto the armory, probably because [X]% of their weapons are snowballs.
- Over [X]% of the armory is coated with sugary fingerprints as the elves leave their mark.
- Over [X]% of the pirate weapons and gear have been thrown out the windows of the armory.
- The elves are establishing a blockade around the armory and have prevented over [X]% of the pirate parts shipments.
- With nearly [X]% of the tools bedazzled, the elves are firmly in control of the armory.
- The elves are busy lowering the work stations at the armory to elf-height, and have lowered [X]% of them.
- In an effort to thwart the pirate war effort, the elves have smashed [X]% of the cutlass and cannon assembly lines.
- [X]% of the production from the armory is now being gift wrapped by the elves.
- The armory is producing a steady supply of [X]% elven gear, under their command.
- [X]% of the tools have been replaced with festive, elf-sized tools at the armory.
- Arrrrr, the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] contrrrrol nearrrly [X]% of the arrrmorrry.
- The [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] are actively reconfiguring the armory to produce nearly [X]% pirate gear.
- The floors of the armory are [X]% swabbed as the [pirates | privateers] take control.
- [X]% of the elven glitter and tinsel has been destroyed in the armory.
- Expect blunderbusses and cutlasses aplenty as the pirates control [X]% of the armory.
- There will be no kelflar produced in the armory as [X]% of the elven looms are smashed.
The Bar At War
- [X]% of the taps are pouring nog as the elves surge ahead at the bar.
- Over [X]% of the cocktails on the menu currently feature nog instead of grog!
- Over [X]% of the bartenders are wearing red and white elf support ribbons.
- Taking advantage of a minor advance, the elves have smashed [X]% of the nog barrels at the bar.
- With the elves firmly in control, the odors of the bar are leaning [X]% peppermint.
- More than [X]% of the well bottles at the bar have been replaced by rum by the crimbuccaneers.
- The crimbuccaneers have replaced [X]% of the bartop with driftwood to give it that on-ship feel.
- The [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] have replaced [X]% of the frilly bar signs with hastily scrawled parchment missives.
- The [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders] with [X]% control of the bar have started replacing the nog taps.
- [X]% of the nog cartons lie smashed on the ground as the [pirates | privateers] assert their dominance at the bar.
- [X]% of the glitter and tinsel decoration on the bar has been torn down by the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders].
- Over [X]% of the bar patrons are currently [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders].
- The crowd around the bar is [X]% privateers and the few remaining elves are stuck trying to order behind endless lines.
- Over [X]% of the bartenders are now wearing eye-patches.
- Nearly [X]% of the rafters in the bar are occupied by parrots and rigging.
- Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, and that will be [X]% true at the bar if you are a pirate!
The Embattled Factory
- Over [X]% of the factory works have joined the Elven Workers Union, at this point.
- The elves have replaced [X]% of the water fountains in the factory with syrup fountains.
- [X]% of the vending machines in the factory breakroom have been replaced with candy machines by the elven managers.
- The elves are holding hands a forming a barricade around [X]% of the factory.
- [X]% of the factory equipment has been devoted to teddy bears and crimbo sweaters.
- Over [X]% of the factory floor equipment has been wrapped in wrapping paper by the elves.
- [X]% of the factory production has been devoted to crimbuccaneer gear.
- Nearly [X]% of the machinery at the factory features a jolly roger flag.
- Crimbuccaneers have mobbed the factory floor, running [X]% of the machinery.
- [X]% of the sweater machines have been switched over to crimbuccaneer focused barnacle application.
- You can gauge the extent of pirate control at the factory, by the [X]% of the rafters filled with one-eyed parrots.
- Nearly [X]% of the factory water dispensers have been replaced with grog dispensers by the [crimbuccaneers | pirates | privateers | raiders].
Ending
- The mists are beginning to rise around Crimbo Town.
- And now this channel must fade akwardly[sic] into the mists.
Notes
- [X] is 50% and upwards
