Butterknife of Regret

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Drop rate? See Talk:Whisk of Misery

Butterknife of Regret
Monster ID 1294
Locations A Kitchen Drawer
Hit Points 12
Attack 11
Defense 9
Initiative 50
Meat None
Phylum weird
Elements None
Resistance  ?
Monster Parts handle
Artist's Butterknife of Regret
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Butterknife of Regret You're fighting a Butterknife of Regret

The butterknife, not being the sharpest knife in the drawer (no, I mean literally), can only cut the softest of materials.

Well, actually that's not quite true. Like regret, it can cut through almost anything, but it's a slow and painful process. Which doesn't bode well for your immediate future.

Hit Message(s):

It slices you in the head. Did you know that the average head is about the same density as butter? Now you know. Ouch!

It stabs you in the <kidney>. The edge is dull, but the point's surprisingly sharp. Ugh!

It tries to spread you like butter. It doesn't work, but the process is far from pleasant. Ow!

It whacks you with the flat of its blade. Yipe, that stings! Oof!

Critical Hit Message:

It heats itself up on the oven, then slices through your calf like a hot knife through butter. Ugh! (hot damage)

Miss Message(s):

It tries to whack you with the flat of its blade, but you say that'd be wack.

It tries to spread you like butter, but you tell it that it butter not.

It tries to slice you in the <bung>, but your <bung> isn't made out of butter, as far as I know.

It tries to stab you in the <throat>, but you know butter than to fall for that.

Fumble Message:

You ask it if it's acceptable to use a butterknife to cut margarine, and it's too confused to attack. (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Butterknife.gifYou acquire an item: Artist's Butterknife of Regret (25%(?) chance)*

Occurs at A Kitchen Drawer.