Blaine is located in the League of Chef-Magi. He will assign you a variety of quests.
My Other Car Is Made of Meat
- Message before completed the second guild task, or the first time you visit if you completed the Bitchin' Meatcar Quest before the guild changes were made:
- You approach the large oak crate, and peer into the slot on the side. To your surprise, a pair of eyes blink at you from within.
- "Oh, hello," says a voice from the crate. "I'm Blaine. And before you ask, I'm locked in here for one of my final tests as a fully-cerfitied[sic] Mysticologist. I'm supposed to magic my way out of it, you see. Can't quite seem to get it, but I'm sure I'll have it any day now.
- Just between you and me, though, it's a real pain, and that is the truth."
- Message on initial visit:
- You ask Blaine about the meatcar.
- You see his eyes widen behind the slot in his crate.
- "Oh, man, the meatcar! I totally forgot. I left it parked over by Degrassi Knoll... I was gonna go back and get it, but, well, y'know... the crate and all.
- The gnolls have probably stripped it for parts by now, anyway. Here's a list of what you'll need to build a new one."
- Message on subsequent visits:
- "Any luck with the car? Once you've got all of the parts, you can use meat paste to put them together."
- "You rebuilt the meatcar? Thanks a lot! Sounds to me like you could use a vacation after that. Shove your map through the slot here, and I'll give you directions to the beach.
- South of the Border is a nice place to relax, but there's also a travel agency down there if you want to go somewhere a little more exotic."
- Message after having built the bitchin' meatcar (or before receiving the meatcar quest) and talked to him at least once before:
- You knock on the side of the crate, and ask "S'alright?"
- A voice inside mutters "S'alright."
[Player Name] and [Familiar Name] Go To White Citadel
- Message on initial visit:
- You hear Blaine calling you from inside his crate, and bend down to the slot in the side. "Hey, listen, can you do me a favor? I've been stuck in here for a pretty long time, with nothing to eat but dry noodles. I made a take-out order with the White Citadel near Whitey's Grove, but obviously I'm not able to go pick it up. If you go get it for me, I'll pay you back, okay?"
- Message on subsequent visits:
- "Did you get my food yet? Please hurry, I don't think extreme weakness brought on by malnutrition is increasing my chances of magicing my way out of this crate, you know? The White Citadel is near Whitey's Grove, in the Distant Woods."
- You push the burger and fries through the slot in the crate, and listen with slight nausea to the sound of Blaine cramming them in his face as quickly as possible. "Ahhh. Man, that hit the spot. Listen, um, I haven't got any meat in here to pay you with, but you can have this rabbit's foot keychain I've been sucking on to try and get a little protein. Don't worry, I've dried it off."
[playername]'s Delivery Service
- Message on initial visit:
- You hear Blaine calling to you from his crate, and crouch down to listen. "Say, could you do me another favor? I ordered something from the 7-foot Dwarves' factory a couple weeks ago, but it never got delivered. Could you go pick it up for me? You'll have to dress up in one of their uniforms and sneak in through the mine entrance, but that shouldn't be much trouble for an adventurer like yourself, right? Please? I'll pay you for your trouble."
- Well, since he said the magic word ('pay'), why not?
- Message on subsequent visits:
- Did you pick up that package for me yet? Please hurry, I've been in here so long I'm starting to freak out. It's really hard to think inside this box.
- You slide the bulky envelope through the slot in Blaine's crate. "Finally! Thanks a bunch; here's some meat for your trouble."
- You hear him tear open the envelope. "A precision-engineered crowbar -- exactly what I need to get out of this damn crate... Crap! The nails are on the outside!" You walk away, shaking your head, as he mutters angrily to himself.
 | You gain 1,000 Meat. |
References
- The name Blaine, and the line "it's a real pain, and that is the truth," are references to Stephen King's Dark Tower series, particularly Book 3, The Waste Lands.
- The name Blaine is also a reference to David Blaine, a magician and showman who spent 44 days living in a box without food.
- "S'alright?" "S'alright" is a reference to Señor Wences, the famous Spanish ventriloquist. Part of his act involved having the aforesaid exchange with a "head in a box" named Pedro.
