Black Crayon Hobo

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Black Crayon Hobo
Monster ID 1207
Locations Anywhere, with an Artistic Goth Kid equipped (after fighting a hobo-type monster)
Hit Points 75% of Defense
Attack Moxie (cap at 10 000)
Defense Muscle (cap at 10 000)
Initiative 0
Meat None
Phylum hobo
Elements None
Resistance  ?
Monster Parts arm, bindle, head, leg, torso
crayon shavings
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Black Crayon Hobo You're fighting a Black Crayon Hobo

Nomad, vagabond, call him what you will: the noble hobo exists outside of the oppressive structure of consumer-driven society, his freedom and his bindle his only companions. His cigar stub and five o'clock shadow mark him as unique and special, much like a goth's eyeliner and nail polish.

Hit Message(s):

He scratches you with his five o'clock shadow, leaving black crayon stubble on your face. Ouch! Ugh! Ugh! Argh! Eek! Argh! Ugh!

He pulls out a black crayon pocketknife and carves some hobo glyphs into your <giblets>. Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Eek! Ooh! Argh! Oof!

He smacks you with his bindle.Oof! Oof! Argh! Argh! Ouch! Ouch! Argh!

He lights his black crayon cigar. It doesn't really burn, but he does manage to drip boiling-hot wax on you.Ugh! Ooh! Ow! Argh! Ow! Ugh! Eek!(hot damage)

Critical Hit Message:

He starts shouting nonsense about mind control devices and tinfoil hats, flailing madly. His elbows and knees play your <ankle> like an accordion. Argh! Ouch! Argh!

Miss Message(s):

He tries to scratch you with his black crayon stubble, but crayon shavings aren't particularly sharp.

He tries to smack you with his bindle, but it's too spindly to hurt. Spindly bindle!

He tries to carve hobo glyphs into your arm, but his crayon pocketknife isn't up to the task.

He lights his black crayon cigar and puffs out some black crayon smoke.

Fumble Message:

He opens his bindle and takes a couple of swigs of black crayon moonshine, then plays a lonesome tune on his black crayon harmonica. (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Crayonshavings.gifYou acquire an item: crayon shavings (100.0% chance)*

Occurs anywhere, with Artistic Goth Kid equipped (after fighting a hobo-type monster)


  • The "Nomad, Vagabond, call him what you will" part is lifted nearly word-for-word from the Metallica song "Wherever I May Roam".