Beefy bodyguard bat

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Beefy bodyguard bat
Monster ID 571
Locations The Boss Bat's Lair
Hit Points 25
Attack 25
Defense 22
No-Hit 35
Initiative 50
Meat 200-300
Phylum beast
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts head, wing
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
beefy bodyguard bat You're fighting a beefy bodyguard bat

This is one of the beefiest bats in the burrow, and that's why the Boss Bat chose him as a personal bodyguard. He looks eager to buffet, batter, bedevil, and even berate you, leaving you thoroughly bedraggled. Beware!

Hit Message(s):

He flexes his beefy pectorals at you. You make a quick comparison and feel profoundly humiliated. Oof! Oof! Eek! Oof!

He manhandles you in the <kidney>. Well, as much as something can be manhandled with a tiny claw on the end of a wing. Ow! Eek! Ugh! Ouch!

He delivers a beefy bite to your <solar plexus>. Man. Imagine how bad his bark must be! Argh! Ow! Ugh! Ow!

He picks up a rock in his tiny claws and throws it at your <giblets>. Ouch! Ooh! Eek! Ouch!

Critical Hit Message:

He swoops down, lifts you off the ground, and carries you high into the vaults of the cavern. He tosses you and you bounce off a few stalactites before landing <giblets>-first on a stalagmite. Argh. Oof! Oof! Ugh! Oof!

Miss Message(s):

He flexes his beefy pectorals at you, but you flex yours back.

He tries to bite you on the <neck>, but pulls a muscle in his neck and has to stop to apply some beefy bodyguard bat balm.

He rears back and tries to punch you in the <arse>, but then realizes that he can't really make a fist, on account of he's a bat.

He picks up a rock in his tiny claws and throws it at you, but you duck. No, wait. You bat it away.

Fumble Message:

He flies toward your head, but bumps his own head on a stalactite (maybe it was Stalactite 17?) and is knocked unconscious for a few seconds. (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Meat.gifYou gain 200-300 Meat. (average: 250, stdev: 20.82)*
Pill2.gifYou acquire an item: beefy pill (10% chance)*
You gain 5 <substat>.

Occurs at The Boss Bat's Lair.


  • Implemented with the NS13 update.


  • The fumble message contains a reference to the 1953 film Stalag 17.
  • One of the attack messages refers to the idiom "His bark is worse than his bite"