Bastille Battalion (Master of None)

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Bastille Battalion (Master of None)

Turn #X

Masterofnone 1.png

<Landscape text>. <Bird text>. <Wind text>.

According to your scanners, the nearest enemy castle is <name>, a <castle>.

Try to improve your offensive capabilities

Focus on defense

Look for cheese

Occurs after starting a game of Bastille Battalion


  • Landscape text is one of:
    • The quaint rooftops of a quiet village dot the valley below you
    • You dominate the horizon near a steep river gorge
    • You look idyllic near a beautiful waterfall
  • Bird text is one of:
    • Birds wheel through the cloudless sky
    • The shrieking of seagulls nearly drowns out the cries of the prisoners in your dungeon
  • Wind text is one of:
    • A brisk wind whistles through your portcullis
    • A herd of wild antelope stop to drink at a nearby watering hole
    • A light breeze blows across your battlements
  • Castle names and images depend of the castle type. The type is one of:
    • an avant-garde art castle
      • Jet Light
    • a boring, run-of-the-mill castle
      • Niles the Tame
    • a dark and menacing citadel
      • Inhumane Shortsword
    • a fortress that puts the 'fort' in 'fortified'
      • Merrill the Impenetrable
      • Nicky the Dense
    • an imposing military fortress
      • Private Lum
    • a sprawling chateau
      • Jürgen the Elephantine
      • Large Maggie