Annoying spooky gravy fairy

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Annoying spooky gravy fairy
Monster ID 259
Locations The Bugbear Pens
Hit Points 20
Attack 20
Defense 18
No-Hit 30
Initiative 70
Meat None
Phylum plant
Elements spooky
Resistance None
Monster Parts arm, head, stem
Drops
annoying pitchfork
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
annoying spooky gravy fairy You're fighting an annoying spooky gravy fairy

Unlike the pretty, good-natured fairies you're used to seeing, this one is ugly, twisted, and malevolent. It cackles with evil glee as it flies around the cave, jabbing bugbears with a tiny pitchfork. Then it sees you, and attacks!

Hit Message(s):

The fairy waves its pitchfork like a wand, and your own underwear turns against you in a wedgie of terrifying proportions. (spooky damage) Ooh! Ugh! Eek!

The fairy pokes you in the <shins> with its pitchfork. If only it was using a pitch pipe instead. Those aren't anywhere near as sharp. (spooky damage) Ooh! Ugh! Ouch!

The fairy isn't touching you! It's not touching you! Does this bother you? Does this bug you? It's not touching you! Wait, I guess it is. (spooky damage) Argh! Ugh! Ow!

Critical Hit Message:

The fairy pulls out a tiny chalkboard and begins scraping his pitchfork on it. Gah. Ow! Oof! Ooh! (spooky damage)

Miss Message(s):

The fairy tries to jab you in the <head>, but misses. It looks a little annoyed at itself.

The fairy giggles evilly and starts monologuing about how it'll defeat you. It's a great speech, but it's not an attack.

The fairy tries to poke you in the eyes, but you block with the edge of your hand. It really should have seen that coming.

Fumble Message:

The fairy pulls out a tiny chalkboard and scrapes his pitchfork on it, but you manage to distract yourself from the sound by chewing on some tinfoil. (FUMBLE!)


After Combat

Pitchfork.gifYou acquire an item: annoying pitchfork (100% chance)*
You gain 5 <substat>.

Occurs at The Bugbear Pens (pre-Felonia).

References

  • "The fairy tries to poke you in the eyes, but you block with the edge of your hand" refers to an old Three Stooges routine.
  • A pitch pipe is a small device used to provide a pitch reference for singers or for tuning instruments. This is mentioned because pitch is the root of pitchfork. The reason that the following text, "Those aren't anywhere near as sharp." is funny is because unless it is specifically a sharp note pipe, a pitch pipe will be on pitch, not acoustically sharp (or flat, for that matter).