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|Locations||Every 11 turns while wearing an "I Voted!" sticker|
|Hit Points||75% of Defence|
|Attack||Moxie + 5 (cap at 1 000)|
|Defense||Muscle + 5 (cap at 1 000)|
|Monster Parts||head, middle, tail|
The new mayor has apparently started a snake-breeding program, to make sure there's lots of snakes everywhere. You can hardly walk anywhere without tripping over one. Oops, you just tripped over one.
It turns out the new mayor's "long friends" are basically indistinguishable from Earth snakes, except for the rate at which they breed. Which is extremely fast.
This snake has been stamped with a little federal seal that says "Inspected by No. 37." It seems pretty annoyed by the whole ordeal.
When you think about it, probably the reason the ancient Pork Elves wrote and arted about snakes so much is because they lived in the jungle and snakes were just everywhere all the time. It doesn't mean they particularly liked snakes. This snake in particular certainly isn't very friendly.
So it turns out the vampire version of a go-gurt is a snake. I guess that makes a sort of sense.
The snake bites you on the <kidney>. Ouch! Argh! Ouch! Eek!
The snake uses its fangs to impale your <calf>. Eek! Ugh! Ouch! Ow!
The snake punctures your <arse> with its fangs. Argh! Ow! Argh! Eek!
The snake makes two little holes in your <solar plexus> with its fangs. Snakes really only have one kind of attack, and there aren't a lot of different ways to describe it. (CRITICAL HIT!) Ouch! Ow! Eek!
The snake tries to bite you but it missed. It made a missnake. ...Sorry.
The snake hisses angrily, but it takes more than a pointy tube to scare you.
The snake shakes its rattle at you, so you shake your butt at it. Now it's angrier.
The snake takes out a little whetstone and gives its fangs a touch-up. (FUMBLE!)
|You gain 20-30 Meat. (average: 25, stdev: 2.42)*|
|You acquire an item: snake skin (100% chance)*|
Occurs every 11 adventures, if wearing an "I Voted!" sticker.
- This monster cannot be copied.
- Bears an uncanny resemblance to the Gadsden Flag.