Ancient insane monk

From TheKolWiki
Jump to: navigation, search


Ancient insane monk
Monster ID 534
Locations The Haiku Dungeon
Hit Points 6
Attack 4
Defense 3
No-Hit 14
Initiative 50
Meat None
Phylum dude
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts head, arm, leg, torso
Drops
Bash-Ōs cereal, bottle of sake
Quest haiku challenge map
Pickpocket little round pebble
Manuel Fu Manchu Wax
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
ancient insane monk This room is the home
of an ancient insane monk,
and you're trespassing.


Venerable monk,
as old as he is insane
and, like, twice as mean.

or

This studious monk
went nuts from contemplating
too many koans.

Hit Message(s):

Spring near a still pond
is nothing like this moment.
Your kidney gets stabbed.
He stops, meditates.
The sound of one hand smacking
you in the <arse>.
Are you the Buddha?
You must be, because
this monk's killing you.
Herons by a lake
cannot prevent this attack
man, your elbow hurts.
Miss Message(s):
He swings, he misses.
In the distance, crickets chirp.
He walks off, pouting.
Herons by a lake
lilies in a limpid pool
(his attack just failed.)
All his attacks fail
like a n00bish grasshopper
he has much to learn.
"I'm not the buddha!"
The monk listens, considers,
doesn't attack you.
Spring near a still pond
is somewhat like this moment:
Neither one hurts you.

After Combat


Mix.gif
Near you on the ground
is a Bash-Ōs cereal.
You hork it and jet.
(15% chance*)
Bottle.gif
bottle of sake
was once your foe's, is now yours.
Beaters-up, keepers.
(25% chance*)
Map.gif
Near you on the ground
is a haiku challenge map.
You hork it and jet.

Occurs at The Haiku Dungeon.

Notes

References

  • The haiku:
"I'm not the buddha!"
The monk listens, considers,
doesn't attack you.

refers to the Buddhist saying "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him."