- For the location on the Wrong Side of the Tracks, see Oliver's Place.
| There are some vague or non-exact figures and information on this page. Some spading is required.
A Speakeasy is located in the Clan VIP Lounge after a Clan speakeasy has been used.
You step into the phone booth. The phone rings, and you answer it. "Welcome, Sir/Madam," says the voice on the other end, the voice of a posh respectable gentleman. "Please consult the phone book and tell me what you'd like."
You open the book, and sure enough, it's a cocktail menu.
(You can have X more drinks from the speakeasy today.)
|glass of "milk"||250 Meat|
|cup of "tea"||250 Meat|
|thermos of "whiskey"||250 Meat|
|Lucky Lindy||500 Meat|
|Bee's Knees||500 Meat|
|Ish Kabibble||500 Meat|
|Hot Socks||5,000 Meat|
|Phonus Balonus||10,000 Meat|
|Sloppy Jalopy||100,000 Meat|
| Tell the bartender a drink password:
- Giving a correct password:
- Giving an incorrect password:
- Attempting to unlock a drink already unlocked:
- Attempting to purchase a fourth+ drink (through URL manipulation, repeatedly clicking the button, etc.):
- Attempting to purchase a drink when already overdrunk:
- Attempting to purchase a drink when in Oxygenarian or Teetotaler:
- Attempting to purchase a drink when in KOLHS:
- Attempting to purchase a drink without enough meat on hand:
- Attempting to purchase an invalid drink or a drink that does not exist:
- Giving a correct password unlocks the associated drink for your entire clan. Locked drinks will not appear in the menu until their password has been given.
- Giving an incorrect password disables the password entry box for 15 minutes. There is also clan-wide limit of about 100 guesses/day (needs spading).
- All passwords, except "swordfish", are specific to a particular clan.
- The password "swordfish" unlocks the Lucky Lindy.
- The blue password to unlock the Bee's Knees can be found by doing the following:
- Helping out Bart Ender, who will tell you a blue clue of the form "my <relative>"
- Using a clockwork bartender-in-the-box will give you a blue clue of the form "<verb>"
- Using fat stacks of cash in combat against the Copperhead Club bartender will give you a blue clue of the form "<drink>"
- The password is then "my <relative> <verb> <drink name>" without the quotes.
- The yellow password to unlock the Sockdollager can be found by equipping a detective skull. The password consists of four words, separated by a blank, which the skull will randomly state in yellow during combat.
- The first word is always an adjective, but the other three seem to be in a completely random order.
- The brown password to unlock the Ish Kabibble can be found by summoning the Friend of Gary, whose name can be learned by equipping Lord Spookyraven's ear trumpet and adventuring in The Cola Wars Battlefield (undisguised).
- The red password to unlock the Hot Socks can be found by Resting:
- The password is 11 characters long, all uppercase, with no repeating characters
- Each person in the clan can rarely find a single letter (shown in red) by resting
- All letters found will be in the password
- A list of all the words that qualify can be found here. A tool that will tell you all possible words based on the letters found and what specific locations of those letters are known here.
- The position of a character's red letter (e.g. 4 or 7) is the same across clans (but not necessarily across ascension).
- The pink clan-specific password to unlock the Phonus Balonus is found occasionally when collecting Hooch at the Around the world adventure in The Time-Twitching Tower.
- The orange password to unlock the Flivver is spoken by Hodgman, The Hoboverlord in orange during combat.
- The purple, clan-specific 55-character password to unlock the Sloppy Jalopy can be found by piecing together many 5-character purple strings from 64735 scrolls.
- By entering a clan with a fully known password, a player's string index (e.g. 1–5 or 13–17) can be found. This index is the same across clans (but not necessarily across ascension). This can reduce the number of codes needed to identify the full 55-character string.
|glass of "milk"||1||87.5||0||0||2.5||2.5||250|
|Cup of "tea"||1||0||87.5||0||2.5||2.5||250|
|thermos of "whiskey"||1||0||0||87.5||2.5||2.5||250|
|Lucky Lindy||6||0||0||0||17-19?||2.83-3.17?||500||Gives intrinsic Lucky!|
|Bee's Knees||2||15||15||15||7||3.5||500||Gives effect On the Trolley (+100% all stats).|
|Sockdollager||2||0||0||0||7||3.5||500||Gives effect In a Lather (increases weapon and spell damage).|
|Ish Kabibble||2||0||0||0||7||3.5||500||Gives effect Feeling No Pain (increases damage and elemental resistance).|
|Hot Socks||3||0||0||0||12||4||5000||Gives effect Hip to the Jive (increases familiar weight and experience gain).|
|Phonus Balonus||3||0||0||0||12||4||10000||Grants 5 pvp fights in addition to the adventure gain.|
|Flivver||2||15||15||15||12.5||6.25||20000||Grants 50-90 Mana Points.|
|Sloppy Jalopy||5||30||30||30||20||4||100000||Gives the skill Hollow Leg (+1 maximum drunkenness).|
- You cannot consume more than 3 Speakeasy drinks in a single day.
- Drinking a Speakeasy drink through a Schrödinger's thermos will not count against your limit of 3 drinks per day.
- Drinks bought from a Speakeasy didn't show up in your consumption history during the first weeks after implementation. During the radio show on July 17, 2014 the Asymmetric team briefly expressed their surprise about this and it was fixed around the 20th of July 2014.
- Speakeasy would think you are overdrunk (thus declining your purchases) if you had some liver capacity increases. This was fixed some time in 2018.