Wart Dinsey

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Wart Dinsey
Monster ID 1770
Locations Maint Misbehavin'
Hit Points 1000
Attack 700
Defense 700
Initiative 250
Meat None
Phylum construct
Elements stench
Resistance  ?
Monster Parts unknown
Drops
brain preservation fluid, Wart Dinsey: An Afterlife, Dinsey's oculus, Dinsey's radar dish, Dinsey's pizza cutter, Dinsey's brain, Dinsey's pants, Dinsey's glove
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Wart Dinsey You're fighting Wart Dinsey

You slide each of the keycards in turn through the appropriate slots, and the Cryo-Storage door slides open.

You slowly proceed through it, past a complicated airlock puzzle that I won't bore you with the details of, and into the dimly-lit central chamber of Dinseylandfill's cryogenic storage facility.

There is a hiss and an exhalation of frosty air as a cyclopean metal sarcophagus/soda can rises from the floor in the center of the room. Its doors swing open to reveal a hulking robotic exoskeleton attached to a brain in a jar.

The rumors are true! Wart Dinsey was a horrible racist! I mean Wart Dinsey did have his brain cryogenically preserved and placed in a murderous robot body!

The radar dish on top of its head swings toward you and a speaker somewhere crackles to life. "That's the trouble with the world:" says a monotone voice, "too many people grow up. I'll make sure you don't make that mistake."

Hit Message(s):

"I suppose my formula might be: dream, diversify and never miss your <kidney> when I punch it." He punches you in the <arm>.Ow! Ow! Oof! Ooh! Ugh!

"If you can dream it, you can do it. I dreamed I cut your throat." He slashes you with his roaring buzzsaw arm. Argh! Oof! Oof! Ooh! Ooh!

"You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you." He kicks you in the teeth.Ugh! Argh! Oof! Ouch! Ugh!

"For every laugh, there should be a tear." He kicks you in the <foot> hard enough to make tears well up in your eyes. Ow! Ooh! Argh! Ooh! Ouch!

Critical Hit Message:

not known

Miss Message(s):

"I suppose my formula might be: dream, diversify and never miss an angle," he says. "Thanks for the tip!" you reply.

"For every laugh, there should be a tear," he says. You laugh at him, and he sheds a single tear. Or maybe it's a droplet of lubricant. It's hard to tell.

Fumble Message:

"If you can dream it, you can do it," says the voice. "Okay," you reply. (FUMBLE!)


After Combat


Dinseyfluid.gifYou acquire an item: brain preservation fluid (100% chance)*
Book4.gifYou acquire an item: Wart Dinsey: An Afterlife (?% chance)*

As a Seal Clubber:

Dinseyeye.gifYou acquire an item: Dinsey's oculus (100% chance)*

As a Turtle Tamer:

Dinseydish.gifYou acquire an item: Dinsey's radar dish (100% chance)*

As a Pastamancer:

Dinseycutter.gifYou acquire an item: Dinsey's pizza cutter (100% chance)*

As a Sauceror:

Dinseybrain.gifYou acquire an item: Dinsey's brain (100% chance)*

As a Disco Bandit:

Disneypants.gifYou acquire an item: Dinsey's pants (100% chance)*

As a Accordion Thief:

Dinseyglove.gifYou acquire an item: Dinsey's glove (100% chance)*

Notes

  • Wart Dinsey has a hard damage cap of 100 from all damage sources and types (except stench, which is of course reduced to 1).
  • He has special attacks that occur in each round of combat, starting with the first round (regardless of whether you win initiative) and including the round that he would be killed on (this is similar to a Warbear Officer's drone). Damage appears to be roughly your maximum HP, but is reduced by Elemental Resistance. The number of special attack instances increases by 1 each round:
    • You accidentally step in a puddle of industrial lubricant.
      You lose X hit points. (sleaze damage)
    • A nearby liquid nitrogen pipe ruptures, hosing you down with frigid liquid.
      You lose X hit points. (cold damage)
    • You accidentally brush up against one of the facility's heat exhaust pipes, burning your ankle.
      You lose X hit points. (hot damage)
    • From somewhere deep in the facility you hear a recording of Wart Dinsey's voice from before he died. It's super creepy.
      You lose X hit points. (spooky damage)
    • You step too close to one of the facility's waste-disposal hatches. The smell is unbearable.
      You lose X hit points. (stench damage)
  • If you kill him as something other than one of the base six classes (ex. as an Avatar of Boris or Actually Ed the Undying), then he doesn't drop any additional outfit piece.
  • The HP reduction from shrinking powder doesn't count as damage, and is not affected by the damage cap.
  • One way to kill him is to up your elemental resistance and use a mercenary pistol. Then funksling boneburners and splatterers.

Occurs at Maint Misbehavin' (Cryo-Stasis with all 4 keycards).