Uncle Crimbo's Mobile Home
From TheKolWiki
Uncle Crimbo's Mobile Home was located in Crimbo Town at The Big Mountains:
On December 20th
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Ho, ho, ho, Adventurer! Merry Crimbo!
Well, actually, it's not particularly merry. As you may have noticed, my elves are on strike, and are staging a violent protest at the toy factory. I guess that means I'm gonna have to make all of the toys myself this year.
My skills are pretty rusty, (and I'm sort of drunk, actually,) but I still remember how to make a thing or two. Bring me some parts from the factory, and we'll see what I can do.
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Through December 25th:
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Ho, ho, ho, Adventurer! Merry Crimbo!
Well, actually, it's not particularly merry. As you may have noticed, my elves are on strike, and are staging a violent protest at the toy factory. I guess that means I'm gonna have to make all of the toys myself this year.
My skills are pretty rusty, (and I'm sort of drunk, actually,) but I'm remembering how to make more and more stuff as time goes by.
Bring me some parts from the factory, and we'll see what I can do.
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After December 25th:
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Ho, ho, ho, Adventurer! Merry Crimbo!
Well, actually, it's not particularly merry. As you may have noticed, my elves are on strike, and are staging a violent protest at the toy factory. I guess that means I'm gonna have to make all of the toys myself this year.
Today it occurred to me that I could send my reindeer in to beat some sense into those elves. We'll see how that works out. Also, I've finally remembered how to make all of the toys I used to be able to make!
Bring me some parts from the factory, and we'll see what I can do.
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Bring back toy parts from the Toy Factory, and Uncle Crimbo will make toys for you.
Toymaking Text
- If you don't have the items required:
- I can't remember how to make anything with the items you have collected.
- Successful toy making:
- You give the pieces to Uncle Crimbo, who skillfully assembles them into a new toy.
- Unsuccessful toy making:
- You don't have enough items to make that many of that kind of toy.
- Trying to make an item which isn't listed:
- I don't know how to make that.
On December 25, 2006, Linnea's Monster Truck was replaced by Uncle Crimbo's Mobile Home:
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| Uncle Crimbo
Hey, how's it going! I'm feeling much, much better since my vacation. Once I get my bearings back, I'll put Crimbo Town back the way it was, but for now, I figure I'll just let Linnea's minions continue to work.
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You've found:
X spooky length of string
X evil googly eye
X spooky stuffing
X spooky felt
X spooky wooden block
X spooky toy wheel
I think I can make the stuff Linnea was making:
Spooky Toymaking Text
- If you don't have the items required:
- "Doesn't look like I can make anything with what you've got. Keep scroungin', kid."
- Successful toymaking:
- You hand the parts to Uncle Crimbo. He tinkers around with them for a while, then says "Here ya go, kid. Have... er... fun with this, I guess."
- Unsuccessful toymaking:
- You don't have enough parts to make that many of that.... that. That that that.
- Trying to make an item which isn't listed:
- That's not something Uncle Crimbo can make.
Uncle Crimbo's Mobile Home was located in Crimbo Town at The Big Mountains:
On December 12th
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Ah, it's about time you showed up, kid. Listen, I've got a real problem here, and unless you help me out, I'm going to have to cancel Crimbo this year. The ship that crashed over here is full of freakin' alien cyborgs, or something! They took over my workshop, kidnapped Rudolph the Red, and turned all of my elves into killer elfbots. Not only that, but they're up to no good in that ship over there -- I can hear 'em welding and doing god-knows-what at all hours of the day and night.
If you want to put the hurt on 'em, I can probably make some toys out of whatever you can pull off of 'em. I studied their technology, and I -- well, it didn't make a damn bit of sense to me, kid, but the reindeer did some reverse-engineering on it.
If you're lookin' to get in, they hide the key underneath the doormat. Can't miss it, kid.
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Upon defeating Father Crimbo
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Holy cow, kid, I didn't know you had it in you! So my brother was behind the whole thing, huh? That figures -- every time I tried to get ahead in life, he was always there to one-up me. I'm pretty impressed you chose me over him, kid, all things considered. I kind of figured I'd screwed up Crimbo like I've screwed up everything else, and you'd jump at the chance to have me out of here.
You say you didn't have a choice? Well, that's sweet, kid, that you believed so strongly in me that you felt like it wasn't even a choice. Have a Happy Crimbo, kid, you earned it.
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After having defeated Father Crimbo
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Hey, kid. Thanks again for saving Crimbo from my brother and his Crimborg. Tell ya what I'll do -- you bring some toy parts to me, and I'll assemble them for you, free of charge. You earned it, kid.
Oh, hey, there are still a few creepy elfborgs in the workshop, though. Would you mind taking 'em out for me, kid?
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Bring back toy parts from the Toy Factory, and Uncle Crimbo will make toys for you.
Toymaking Text
- If you don't have the items required:
- C'mon kid, you do your job so I can do mine. I can't make you any toys unless you bring me some parts, and if you don't take out those cyborg freaks, there's no Crimbo for anybody. You want that restin' on your conscience?
- Successful toymaking:
- Man, this stuff is freaky. I don't trust technology, kid. Give me a good old-fashioned cigar, a good old-fashioned Old Fashioned, and a roaring fire any day of the week. I don't need it to play music, make phone calls, and do my laundry, you know? Here ya go, kid.
Toymaking with Old Parts
Hey, I see you're still lugging around some of our old toy parts. I suppose I can put them together for you, if you want.
You have the following toy parts:
X rock
X stringy sinew
X stick
X tooth
X spooky length of string
X evil googly eye
X spooky stuffing
X spooky felt
X spooky wooden block
X spooky toy wheel
X capacitor relay
X carbon nanotube frame
X ion grid
X Feynman gate
X logic synthesizer
X high-resistance ultrapolymer plating
X servomechanical torsion facilitator
X quantum polarity inducer
X bi-lateral logic compressor
X computronic processing unit
X reverse-oscillating klystron
X sub-molecular interocitor
X recursive spline reticulator
X atomic vector plotter
X ion-pulse modulation stabilizer
X hyperbolic plasma focuser
X length of string
X google eye
X stuffing
X felt
X wooden block
X toy wheel
With that, I can make the following:
Anything that could be made on previous Crimbos (see above -- not including the Crimboween recipe for the Pet Rock).
Toymaking Text
- Successful toymaking with standard parts:
- Aw, man, this takes me way back. Back to when those no-good elves thought they were too good to be workin' in the factory, that is. Here's your toy, kid -- I do everything else around here, why shouldn't I make all the toys?
- Successful toymaking with prehistoric parts:
- Wow, kid, you sure know how to give me a challenge. I mean, look at this thing! It's so easy, a caveman could make it!
Oh, great. Listen, don't tell anyone I said that, okay? The last thing I need is another damn lawsuit.
- Successful toymaking with spooky parts:
- Ah, the memories, kid. Did I tell you about that hot little hula dancer I met while I was on that tropical island? Never mind, never mind, I'll tell you when you're older. Anyway, here's your scary toy. Don't let it give you nightmares, kid.
- Successful toymaking with Crimborg Collective parts:
- This is some wild, freaky, futuristic stuff, isn't it? Be careful with this crap, kid, and don't hurt yourself.
References
- The quote "It's so easy, a caveman could make it!" is a reference to a Geico car insurance advertising campaign, with the slogan, "It's so easy, a caveman could do it," which was followed by an advertising campaign where cavemen got offended by that statement.
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