On the Verge of a Dirge

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On the Verge of a Dirge

You put your spookily-gloved hand in the depression, and feel a slight vibration coming from the door. Without warning (though you pause briefly to consider exactly how a door could warn you about something,) the depression glows red hot, the glove smolders and then bursts into flames, and you yank your hand away with a scream. The door grinds open slowly.

The door grinds slowly open.

The door slowly grinds open.

Slowly, the door grinds open.

Felonia, Queen of the Spooky Gravy Fairies -- (edit metadata)

Felonia, Queen of the Spooky Gravy Fairies

Item Drops: spooky bicycle chain, spooky cosmetics bag, miniature carton of clove cigarettes (if Spooky Gravy Fairy is active familiar) Meat Drop: None Substat Gain: 15 Monster Level: 60 Moxie for No Hit*: 67 Monster Defense: 75 Hit Points: 115 Initiative: ? Elemental Resistance: spooky Elemental Weakness: hot and stench Physical Resistance: None Note: The miniature carton of clove cigarettes only drops if you defeat her with a Spooky Gravy Fairy active.

Occurs at The Spooky Gravy Barrow as a possible choice of How Depressing.

References

• The four permutations of the door slowly grinding open allude to the maze of twisty little passages from the game Colossal Cave Adventure.
• "No other possibility" is a phrase used in many tracks by the experimental band Negativland, a favorite of Jick's. It is also the title of their 1989 video production.