Jack's Swagger Shack

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Swagger Jack runs Jack's Swagger Shack in Huggler Memorial Colosseum. It is also known as The Swagger Shop.


Swagger Jack Swagger Jack

"Howdy, pard. If you've got the swagger, we've got the swag."

Items Sold

Radio.gif Huggler Radio
Buy (50 swagger)
Insultinghat.gif insulting hat
Buy (1,000 swagger)
Chaplinstache.gif offensive moustache
Buy (2,000 swagger)
Book3.gif How to Hold a Grudge
Buy (3,000 swagger)
Document thumb.gif fettucini épines Inconnu recipe
Buy (5,000 swagger)
Document thumb.gif slap and slap again recipe
Buy (5,000 swagger)
Microwave.gif cursed microwave
Buy (10,000 swagger)
Ponykeg.gif cursed pony keg
Buy (10,000 swagger)
Hairshirt.gif hairshirt
Buy (2,000 swagger)
Book4.gif How to Tolerate Jerks
Buy (2,000 swagger)
Puppetstrings.gif puppet strings
Buy (100 swagger)
Baggedl.gif bagged stuffed "L"
Buy (500 swagger)
Stuffedclub.gif stuffed club
Buy (500 swagger)
Chest2.gif Black Bart's Booty
Buy (Y,000 swagger)
You must earn Y,000 swagger during a pirate season to purchase this item.
Book.gif Holiday Hal's Happy-Time Fun Book!
Buy (Y,000 swagger)
You must earn Y,000 swagger during a holiday season to purchase this item.
Carrot.gif Antagonistic Snowman Kit
Buy (Y,000 swagger)
You must earn Y,000 swagger during an ice season to purchase this item.
Map.gif Map to Kokomo
Buy (1,234 swagger)
You must earn 1,234 swagger during a drunken season to purchase this item.
Stench.gif Essence of Bear
Buy (Y,000 swagger)
You must earn Y,000 swagger during bear season to purchase this item.
Book.gif Manual of Numberology
Buy (Y,000 swagger)
You must earn Y,000 swagger during a numeric season to purchase this item.
Cd1.gif ROM of Optimality
Buy (1,000 swagger)
You must earn 1,000 swagger during an optimal season to purchase this item.
Scroll2.gif School of Hard Knocks Diploma
Buy (1,000 swagger)
You must earn 1,000 swagger during a school season to purchase this item.
(You probably don't ever want more than 11 of these.)
Testtube.gif Essence of Annoyance
Buy (X,000 swagger)
You have A swagger.
You've earned B swagger during a pirate season, yarrr.
You've earned C swagger during a holiday season, fun!
You've earned D swagger during an ice season, brrrr!
You've earned E swagger during a drunken season!
You've earned F swagger during bear season!
You've earned G swagger during a numeric season!
You've earned H swagger during an optimal season.
You've earned I swagger during a school season!

Notes

  • On your first visit, if your character pre-dates the April 30, 2012 PvP update:
    In honor of your dedication and skill during the long PvP Pre-season, the judges have awarded you a bonus!*:

    You gain some swagger (+X)
    • The amount of pre-season swagger awarded is (pretty flowers picked / 25) + (White Canadians consumed / 2.5), rounded down.
  • When you purchase something:
You trade some of your swagger for a slick new item!
SomethingYou acquire... something. [[Data:{{{item}}}]]
  • If you can't afford something:
You can't afford that! And don't think you can steal it either!
  • If you try to buy something that isn't for sale:
That's not an item you can buy. Sociopath.
The Obligations of Ronin prevent you from turning in your swagger right now.
  • Or in Hardcore:
The Tenets of Hardcore prevent you from turning in your swagger right now.
  • During special seasons, Swagger Jack has a different introduction (and sometimes, a different name). A special item is available for purchase only during that season, and you must acquire its entire purchase price in any season of that type in order to purchase it. The special swagger you've earned for that season only is displayed below your current total swagger.
  • Attempting to purchase a special season item without enough special swagger results in this message:
    You must earn at least X swagger during <a(n)> <type> season to purchase this item.
  • If you have enough swagger to purchase more than one School of Hard Knocks Diploma, this message appears:
    (You probably don't ever want more than 11 of these.)
  • During a pirate season, Swagger Jack's costume and introduction differ:
Piratem.gif Swagger Jack

"Ahoy, mate. If you be having the swagger, we be having the swag."

  • During a holiday season, Swagger Jack is on vacation:
Hcrimboelf.gif Holiday Hal

"Happy Holidays! Jack's on vacation, but if you have swagger, spend it here to increase your Holiday Fun!"

  • During an ice season, Swagger Jack is being helped out by a helpful snowflake:
Clip snowflake.gif Flakey, the Helpful Snowflake

"It looks like you're trying to spend some swagger..."

  • During a drunken season, Swagger Jack is unable to operate the shack:
Barkeep.gif Bart Ender

"Jack doesn't have his liquor license, so I'm helping out this season. What'll it be, buddy?"

  • During a numeric season, the Spirit of Paul Erdõs is operating the shack:
Elizabeth.gif Spirit of Paul Erdõs

"I may not be with you phsyically[sic], but let's collaborate on some purchases. Just make sure and credit me when you publish."
(Huh, where's Jack?)

  • During an optimal season, Jack is replaced with a more optimal host:
Tnbot3.gif PvP Calcutron 3000

"Greetings contestant, Jack is... indisposed. Insert swagger, receive output."

  • During a school season, Jack is suspended from the shack:
Chalmers.gif Principal Mooney

"Swagger Jack is suspended, so I'm here to make sure you all follow the rules and stand in line."

  • Jack seems to operate the shack as normal during bear season.

History

  • On August 07, 2013, puppet strings were temporarily removed from the swagger shop, presumably due to Hinch. When they returned, the price rose from 100 swagger to 101 swagger (and continued to rise for a while). CDMoyer said the price would go up by 1 every hour. This didn't happen for the first few hours, which made it seem as if it wasn't working, but then a few hours later it rose as predicted.
    [pvp] CDMoyer: Puppet strings are going up 1 swagger in price every hour until you collectively disavow hinch.
  • The puppet string price was restored to normal (100 swagger) on ??.
  • Holiday Hal's Happy-Time Fun Book! could not be purchased in Hardcore or Ronin until November 11, 2014.
  • Flakey's Antagonistic Snowman Kit could not be purchased in Hardcore or Ronin until January 21, 2015.
  • Before March 21, 2015, Bart Ender's name was "Bart Enter".

References

See Also