The Haiku Dungeon

From TheKolWiki

The Hermit humbly requests that this page be rewritten or expanded The revamp that happened on August 29, 2008 changes the entire format of the Haiku Dungeon. Everything needs to be updated. Needs base combat frequency.

The Haiku Dungeon
Location	Dungeon Full of Dungeons
Unlocks	Open by default
Min Stat	5
Combat %	0
Quest/s	Most Extreme Haiku Challenge
ML	0
Special adventures
Clover	none
edit data

The Haiku Dungeon is one of the dungeons in The Dungeon Full Of Dungeons.

All messages in the dungeon are in haiku. See Haiku Dungeon combat for generic combat messages.

If your main stat isn't high enough, you'll see the following message:

This dungeon is deep, unlike your well of courage. You jet. Big sissy.

[edit] Combat Adventures

amateur ninja -- (edit metadata)
amateur ninja	Item Drops: bargain flash powder, third-hand nunchaku Meat Drop: 18-22 Substat Gain: Expression error: unrecognised punctuation character "?" Monster Level: ? Moxie for No Hit*: ? Hit Points: 5 Elemental Resistance: unconfirmed; change to none if confirmed as none. Elemental Weakness: ? Physical Resistance: ?

ancient insane monk (studious) -- (edit metadata)
ancient insane monk (studious)	Item Drops: Bash-Os cereal, bottle of sake Quest Items: haiku challenge map Pickpocket: little round pebble Meat Drop: None Substat Gain: Expression error: unrecognised punctuation character "?" Monster Level: ? Moxie for No Hit*: ? Hit Points: 6 Elemental Resistance: unconfirmed; change to none if confirmed as none. Elemental Weakness: ? Physical Resistance: ?

ancient insane monk (venerable) -- (edit metadata)
ancient insane monk (venerable)	Item Drops: Bash-Os cereal, bottle of sake Quest Items: haiku challenge map Pickpocket: little round pebble Meat Drop: None Substat Gain: Expression error: unrecognised punctuation character "?" Monster Level: ? Moxie for No Hit*: ? Hit Points: 6 Elemental Resistance: unconfirmed; change to none if confirmed as none. Elemental Weakness: ? Physical Resistance: ?

Ferocious bugbear -- (edit metadata)
Ferocious bugbear	Item Drops: bugbear bungguard, bugbear beanie Meat Drop: 17-23 Substat Gain: Expression error: unrecognised punctuation character "?" Monster Level: ? Moxie for No Hit*: ? Hit Points: 5 Elemental Resistance: unconfirmed; change to none if confirmed as none. Elemental Weakness: ? Physical Resistance: ?

gelatinous cube -- (edit metadata)
gelatinous cube	Item Drops: Orcish meat locker, rusty metal ring, rusty metal shaft Meat Drop: 21-29 Substat Gain: Expression error: unrecognised punctuation character "?" Monster Level: ? Moxie for No Hit*: ? Hit Points: 6 Elemental Resistance: unconfirmed; change to none if confirmed as none. Elemental Weakness: ? Physical Resistance: ?

Knob Goblin poseur -- (edit metadata)
Knob Goblin poseur	Item Drops: dope gangsta bling-bling, terrible poem Meat Drop: 17-21 Substat Gain: Expression error: unrecognised punctuation character "?" Monster Level: ? Moxie for No Hit*: ? Hit Points: 5 Elemental Resistance: unconfirmed; change to none if confirmed as none. Elemental Weakness: ? Physical Resistance: ?

[edit] Non-combat Adventures

Gravy Fairy Ring
Gravy Fairy Ring	Gaffle some mushrooms: Obtain 2-3 mushrooms Take some gravy instead, or: Obtain a fairy gravy boat Leave the ring alone: Ends adventure

Haiku Dungeon in the It's About Damn Time
Haiku Dungeon in the It's About Damn Time	Item Drops: red paperclip Note: A one time adventure. Note: Occurs during the Going Postal quest.

The Haiku Dungeon 1
The Haiku Dungeon 1	Beat him with your weapon: Fail the Haiku Challenge Kick him in the junk Try to bribe him with some Meat Note: Part of the Haiku Challenge, and will not occur once it is complete.

The Haiku Dungeon 2
The Haiku Dungeon 2	Try a roundhouse kick Offer the guy some more booze Focus your chi and Hadoken: Fail the Haiku Challenge Note: Part of the Haiku Challenge, and will not occur once it is complete.

The Haiku Dungeon 3
The Haiku Dungeon 3	Give Hung Lo a shot Large Wang's the one you want: Fail the Haiku Challenge Try Enormous Genitals Note: Part of the Haiku Challenge, and will not occur once it is complete.

The Haiku Dungeon 4
The Haiku Dungeon 4	Push the button for ramen Get a tiny plastic zmobie: Fail the Haiku Challenge Buy the boxer shorts Note: Part of the Haiku Challenge, and will not occur once it is complete.

The Haiku Dungeon 5
The Haiku Dungeon 5	Distract him and sneak away Quickly grab the stone Kick him square in the shins: Fail the Haiku Challenge Note: Part of the Haiku Challenge, and will not occur once it is complete.

[edit] Retired Adventures

Haiku Dungeon in the Summer (Xtreme Mage)
Haiku Dungeon in the Summer (Xtreme Mage)	Substat Gain: 2 Wizardliness Note: This adventure was removed on January 24th, 2007, when The Wizard of Ego quest rolled out.

Haiku Dungeon Ruck
Haiku Dungeon Ruck	Item Drops: dope gangsta bling-bling Note: This adventure used to be triggered whenever you adventured here with a ten-leaf clover in your inventory.

Haiku Dungeon Craziness
Haiku Dungeon Craziness	Item Drops: rusty metal ring

Haiku Dungeon Debauchery
Haiku Dungeon Debauchery	Substat Gain: 2 Strengthliness

Haiku Dungeon Depravity
Haiku Dungeon Depravity	Substat Gain: 2 Enchantedness

Haiku Dungeon Excitement (Bugbear)
Haiku Dungeon Excitement (Bugbear)	Item Drops: bugbear bungguard

Haiku Dungeon Excitement (Gelatinous Cube)
Haiku Dungeon Excitement (Gelatinous Cube)	Meat Drops: 15

Haiku Dungeon Excitement (Torch)
Haiku Dungeon Excitement (Torch)	Substat Gain: 1 Wizardliness

Haiku Dungeon Extravaganza
Haiku Dungeon Extravaganza	Substat Gain: 1 Roguishness

Haiku Dungeon Hooray!
Haiku Dungeon Hooray!	Substat Gain: 2 Strengthliness

Haiku Dungeon in the Fall (Start Flexing)
Haiku Dungeon in the Fall (Start Flexing)	Substat Gain: 2 Muscleboundness

Haiku Dungeon in the Fall (Treasure Chest)
Haiku Dungeon in the Fall (Treasure Chest)	Meat Drops: 20

Haiku Dungeon in the Spring (Get Real Drunk)
Haiku Dungeon in the Spring (Get Real Drunk)	Substat Gain: 1 Strongness

Haiku Dungeon in the Spring (Question Every Goblin)
Haiku Dungeon in the Spring (Question Every Goblin)	Item Drops: meat from yesterday

Haiku Dungeon in the Summer (Gold Cojones)
Haiku Dungeon in the Summer (Gold Cojones)	Substat Gain: 1 Cheek

Haiku Dungeon in the Summer (Knocked Dafuggout)
Haiku Dungeon in the Summer (Knocked Dafuggout)	Substat Gain: 3 Smarm

Haiku Dungeon in the Winter (Gravy)
Haiku Dungeon in the Winter (Gravy)	Item Drops: fairy gravy boat

Haiku Dungeon in the Winter (Spoon and Bowl)
Haiku Dungeon in the Winter (Spoon and Bowl)	Meat Drops: 20

Haiku Dungeon Insanity
Haiku Dungeon Insanity	Substat Gain: 2-3 Smarm

Haiku Dungeon Loot
Haiku Dungeon Loot	Item Drops: Orcish meat locker

Haiku Dungeon Lunch Break
Haiku Dungeon Lunch Break	Meat Drops: 30

Haiku Dungeon Monotony
Haiku Dungeon Monotony	Item Drops: rusty metal shaft Meat Drops: 15

Haiku Dungeon Relaxation
Haiku Dungeon Relaxation	Item Drops: ice-cold Willer

Haiku Dungeon Romance
Haiku Dungeon Romance	Substat Gain: 2 Cheek

Haiku Dungeon Self-Destruction
Haiku Dungeon Self-Destruction	Substat Gain: 3 Mysteriousness

Haiku Dungeon Skullduggery
Haiku Dungeon Skullduggery	Meat Drops: 25

[edit] Notes

• Mr Skullhead mentioned on Radio KoL on July 23, 2007 that the Haiku Dungeon was being worked on and revamped, as it was originally created before Asymmetric was formed, by a person who is no longer with the company. On August 29, 2008, the revamp went into effect.
• The Most Extreme Haiku Challenges don't appear in any particular order.

[edit] References

• The various "Haiku Dungeon in the <season>" adventures may allude to most Japanese haiku being about seasons and nature.