You're fighting the Spaghetti Demon
The rocky island shudders beneath your feet as a tremendous rumbling shakes the cavern. An explosion of lava bursts from the fiery lake, and you cover your face to protect yourself from flying droplets of red-hot magma.
Dramatic organ music fills the air as you slowly lower your hands to witness a monstrosity rise from the molten rock. Wreathed in flames, a wriggling mass of charred noodles opens its glowing red eyes and transfixes you with its glare. Dozens of mouths open and howl in unison: "Pastamancer! Now you die!"
Numerous writhing, screeching, biting tendrils rush toward you. One of them snags your ankle, hoisting you into the air and throwing you across the small island. You hit the stone altar heavily, and sit, dazed, as the mass of noodles snake toward you.
There is a blinding flash of light, and a chorus of heavenly voices rises in counterpoint to the ominous organ music. You watch, mystified, as your Greek Pasta of Peril transforms before your eyes, the bowl of the shining metal pasta spoon becoming wreathed in a fiery red vortex. As the light fades, the spoon rises into the air, pulling you to your feet.
The Spaghetti Demon's scream reverberates inside your skull: "No more games! No more tricks! This time I will finish you!"
Critical Hit Message:
The Spaghetti Elemental's little tentacle-mouths wail a horrible noise that sounds like the chorus of "Sweet Adeline" mixed with your eardrums rupturing. Oof! Oof! Oof! Ouch!
The Spaghetti Elemental grabs you by each ankle and tears you in half. Well, not quite, but you are going to be walking funny for quite a long time. Ooh! Argh! Oof! Eek!
One of the Spaghetti Elemental's little tentacle-mouths wails and gnashes its teeth. Unfortunately, your solar plexus happens to be in the way of its gnashing. Oof! Oof! Argh! Oof!
One of the tentacle-mouths latches onto your neck and starts sucking out your blood. Man, that was some of your favorite blood, too. Eek! Ooh! Oof! Ouch!
The Spaghetti Elemental grabs you with its tentacles and hoists you, struggling, into the air. The little mouths begin to feed. I'm going to put my hands over my eyes now, and you can tell me when it's safe to look again, okay? Ow! Argh! Oof! Oof! Ugh! Ow!
The The Spaghetti Elemental grabs you by each ankle and attempts to tear you in half, but it looks like those years of ballet training have paid off.
One of the tentacle-mouths latches onto your neck, but you slap it away. "No hickeys!"
The Spaghetti Elemental's little tentacle-mouths wail a horrible noise, but you've heard worse on karaoke night.
One of the Spaghetti Elemental's little tentacle-mouths wails and gnashes its teeth. Fortunately you manage to pull your shoulder out of the way just in time.
The Spaghetti Elemental howls in pain and fury, in five-part harmony.
All four of the Spaghetti Elemental's screeching tentacle-mouths rush forward and latch onto you. You struggle, but feel your both your magical essences and physical juices being drained at an alarming rate. The aberration laughs uproariously as you drop to the ground, dizzy and close to fainting.
"No! This cannot be!" the Spaghetti Elemental roars furiously. "You will not escape my wrath!" With one final, desperate leap, it throws itself at the stone altar. The ancient glyphs flare with a dazzling white light, and the ancient shrine explodes.
You are thrown head over heels, and land on your back on one of the floating stepping-stones. Momentarily stunned, you can only watch as the entire mountain begins to shake. Huge boulders fall from the ceiling, sending gouts of lava spraying out of the lake. You recover your wits just enough to get to your feet and scramble for the tunnel entrance. You risk a quick look backwards -- the central island has collapsed into the magma, and the Spaghetti Elemental is nowhere to be seen.
You make your way through the cavern tunnels as quickly as you can, with the ground shaking under your feet and a wave of molten rock hot on your heels (literally). You climb back up into the temple to find the cultists either running around in a panic, or on their knees sobbing. None of them take any notice of you as you race out of the temple -- just ahead of the massive rockslide that buries the evil structure forever. Looking up, you see smoke pouring out of the top of the volcano, but it and the earthquake soon subside -- looks like there's not going to be a full-scale eruption, luckily. Fleeing the underground tunnels was one thing, but you wouldn't have bet much on your chances of getting off this island alive if the entire thing had exploded.
Bruised and battered, you make your way through the outer temple grounds, where those surviving cultists that aren't standing around in shock are attempting to organize a means to get the hell away from this place. They too largely ignore you, and you collapse on the beach near your rowboat, panting for breath.
Occurs at The Nemesis' Lair as the final epic form of the pastamancer nemesis
- The Instant Karma will only drop if you did not skip to the end of lava maze.
- In the beginning of the battle your Legendary Weapon transforms into the Wrath of the Capsaician Pastalords. If you lose it will transform back:
- You lose. As you slink away, dejected and defeated, your Epic Weapon reverts to its original form in a puff of failure.
- This monster cannot be copied.
The Demon has a two stage damage reduction process.
- First, all attacks do 60% of their normal damage, rounded up.
- In addition, if the damage dealt from a single source would otherwise be over 75, a soft damage cap kicks in. The resultant damage is ⌊ 75 + (X-75)0.65 ⌋, where X > 75 is the damage before the soft cap.
- The Demon will perform a special attack any round in which it is not entangled, dealing exactly 34% of your HP, rounded up, even if this would be far less than a normal attack.
- When entangled, it will use a normal attack.
- This "normal" attack has the special property that, even when your Moxie is much higher than the Demon's attack, it will still hit about 1/3 of the time.
- You can use Entangling noodles multiple times in this fight.
- Unlike normal monsters, the Demon has multiple levels of entanglement.
- Using Entangling Noodles against the Demon when it is free partially entangles it, with the message:
- You conjure up a mass of sticky noodles that entangle many of the Spaghetti Demon's tentacles, but unfortunately not all of them.
- Using Entangling Noodles while it is already entangled reinforces the bonds, with the message:
- You conjure up a mass of sticky noodles, reinforcing the bonds on several of the writhing mouth-tipped tentacles. Unfortunately, it seems impossible to bind this flailing snakelike mass entirely.
- The Demon breaks free the round after it is first entangled, or two rounds after you reinforce the bonds.
- Effects which prevent the Demon from acting will, as normal, extend the duration of the noodles.
- While entangled you'll see the message:
- Your opponent struggles against your entangling noodles, to some avail.
- ...and eventually:
- Flailing and screeching from its many mouths, the Spaghetti Elemental breaks free of the entangling noodles that were hampering his movement.
- The easiest way to beat this boss is to throw macrame nets or superamplified boom boxen at it until it dies.
- The second easiest way is to use a Fancypants Scarecrow or Mad Hatrack with the appropriate gear to make it block the enemy's attack 90% of the time. Another form of this strategy would rely on a Levitating Potato with as much weight as possible.
- A very distant third would be to entangle the monster multiple times (using the unique repeatability of Entangling Noodles in this fight), and hit it with multi-sourced damage while it's entangled. Weapon of the Pastalord, when tuned to an element, gives two damage sources (one physical and one elemental). Physical attacks with prismatic damage would give 6 sources. Multiple damage sources are more effective than a single source due to the monster's special damage mitigation.