Scimitarfish
From TheKolWiki
 You're fighting a scimitarfishThis is a fish that natural selection (or the deity of your choice) has endowed with a curved blade sticking off of its nose. It was a bit of an evolutionary (or creationary) dead end, though, because pirates took to pulling these fish out of the water, breaking off the blade, and eating the rest of the fish.
So the scimitarfish is just a sad example of the vagaries of random chance (or the bizarre sense of humor of an ineffable deity. Look, we're not out to offend anyone).
Hit Message(s):
It feints with its scimitar, then smacks you with its tail. Clever fishy. Ow! Eek! Ouch!
It sclices you with its scimitar, leaving an ascymmetric gash. Ouch! Eek! Eek!
It scwings its scimitar and catches you scquare in the <neck>. Eek! Oof! Argh!
Critical Hit Message:
It slaps its scimitar with a resounding schwiiiiing! and charges you, parrying and thrusting. You fall beneath the fishy onslaught, amazed at the sheer scale of the attack. And of that pun. Argh! Ouch! Argh! Ow! Argh! Argh! Oof!
Miss Message(s):
It scwings its scimitar, but miscsces.
It tries to smack you with the flat of its blade, but goes cross-eyed trying to aim.
It tries to sclice you with its scimitar, but you scee the attack coming.
It tries to smack you with its tail, but you high-tail it away.
Fumble Message:
It charges you, scimitar at the ready, but suddenly stops. Its eyes close, and it begins to faintly snore. You shout, "fishy, why are you sleeping?" but it doesn't wake up.
  Meat | You gain 176-264 Meat. (average: 220, stdev: 17.96)* |
Occurs at The Brinier Deepers.
References
- The phrase you shout in the fumble message is also spoken by the character Darla in Finding Nemo.
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