Model skeleton

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Model skeleton
Monster ID 1547
Locations The Haunted Laboratory
Hit Points 85
Attack 76
Defense 81
Initiative 25
Meat None
Phylum construct
Elements spooky
Resistance  ?
Monster Parts arm, gallows, head, leg, torso
funny bone, rubber ribcage, synthetic marrow
Bounty rubber rib
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
model skeleton You're fighting a model skeleton

This skeleton is the standard to which all other skeletons should aspire. The ribs are all perfectly symmetrical, the ratio of pelvis to femur is sublime, and the shape of the mandible would make a sculptor weep.

It was also one of those skeletons that serves as a model for anatomy classes. Unlike the multifarious other skeletons in this game, this one wasn't magically animated; it's being controlled by a poltergeist. Which, y'know, totally different.

Hit Message(s):

It bites you with its skeletal teeth. They're not much different to regular teeth. Eek! Ugh! Ow! Oof!

It breaks off a rib and whips it at your <face>, leaving a beautiful rib-shaped bruise. Ugh! Ooh! Ouch! Oof!

It elbows you with a bony elbow. Eek! Ouch! Oof! Argh!

It hip-checks you with its pelvic bone, flashing you back to the night you were in the mosh pit with that really skinny chick. Ooh! Oof! Oof! Ouch!

It knees you with a perfectly formed patella. You wince even as you marvel at the aesthetic perfection of its kneecap. Ugh! Eek! Eek! Ow! Ugh!

It smacks you with an arm bone. It's far from humerus. Eek! Ouch! Ooh! Oof!

Critical Hit Message:

It kicks and punches you with its perfectly-formed bony fists and feet, until you're so covered in bruises that you wish you were a skeleton. Ouch! Ugh! Oof! Eek!

Miss Message(s):

It thinks about biting you, but its teeth aren't all that well attached without gums.

It tosses a rib at you, but you dodge.

It tries to connect its elbow bone to your solar plexus, but you dodge.

It tries to hip-check you, but you tell it to check itself.

It tries to knee you, but the poltergeist forgets to hold onto the patella, which isn't connected to anything without tendons and whatnot.

It tries to smack you with an arm bone, but you dodge both the attack and the temptation to make a 'humerus' pun.

Fumble Message:

The poltergeist holding it up gets temporarily distracted and the skeleton crashes to the ground. It takes the poltergeist a few minutes to remember which bones are connected to which other bones. (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Bigbone.gifYou acquire an item: funny bone (15% chance)*
Rubberribcage.gifYou acquire an item: rubber ribcage (5% chance)*
Marrow.gifYou acquire an item: synthetic marrow (15% chance)*
Rib.gifYou acquire a bounty item: rubber rib
(X of 13 found)

Occurs at The Haunted Laboratory.