Mind the Fine Print
As you pick your way through the ruins of the tower, you see a weasely little man behind the counter of a little kiosk. He spots you and waves you over.
"Greetings, adventurer!" he says. "Are you troubled by supernatural beings? Do you constantly have to fend off zombies, vampires, ghuols, and lichs?"
"Well...something like that," you say, "but with more dyslexia."
"Well then," he says, eagerly rubbing his hands together, "you need my patent-pending Fiend-B-Gone! Guaranteed to repel all manner of boggarts, beasties, and things that go squish in the night!" He leans forward and adds, "these statements have not been evaluated by the KDA. This product is not intended to diagnose or treat any illness. Side effects may include enlarged nostrils and blistering sunburns."
"Sorry, I didn't catch that last bit. How did you do that?" you say.
"Oh, it wasn't important. How about it? Only 500 meat a bottle, and that's cuttin' me own head off!"
"Okay, you drive a hard bargain. Here, have a free sample!" he says, and shoves a pill down your throat before you can resist.
Oh man... you don't feel so good.
|You acquire an effect: Side Affectation|
(duration: 10 Adventures)
- "And that's cuttin' me own head off!" is probably a reference to C.M.O.T Dibbler in the Discworld series, by Terry Pratchett, or possibly the Omnian version of the character called "Cut Me Own Hand Off Dhblah."
- The small font text refers to many so-called special medicines featured on TV infomercials read faster and usually with the phrase "not evaluated by the FDA" and also "will not treat, prevent, or cure any illness."