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Menacing construct

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Menacing construct
Location A Shimmering Portal
Hitpoints 400
Attack 400
Defense  ?
Initiative  ?
Meat None
Element None
Physical None
Drops
El Vibrato punchcard (115 holes), El Vibrato punchcard (142 holes)
edit data
menacing construct You're fighting a menacing construct

You step through the shimmering portal and find yourself in a long, dimly-lit corridor. The hum of machinery fills the air, the deep, almost imperceptible vibrations filling you with a sense of foreboding. Maybe even fiveboding. You're about to start exploring, when you hear a bellowing voice from behind you.

"PAPAZAK NOGACHA. FUCHANO BUCHOBU BUFULA BEKRONO."

You wheel around to see the source of the voice -- a strange construct, aiming what appears to be some sort of gun at you. How exotic!

Hit Message(s):

The construct glides toward you and clotheslines you with one of the beams of energy holding it together. It hurts way, way more than a regular clothesline would've.

The construct points its gun-like appendage at you and fires a bolt of energy at your <bung>. It leaves a smoking hole and a noticable residue of pain.

The construct sweeps a beam of energy across you, slicing and burning you from <bung> to <bung>.

Critical Hit Message:

The construct bellows "CHASOM TAFU CHOCHA ZAKBUBUCHA." It then fires a beam of energy through your skull and directly into your brain.

Miss Message(s):

The construct sweeps a beam of energy across the room, but you utilize your mad jump-rope skills to avoid it. Did I mention you had mad jump-rope skills before? Well, I should've.

The construct glides toward you and tries to hit you with the butt of its "gun." You sidestep it, making it the butt of your "joke."

The construct points its gun-like appendage at you and fires bolt of energy that narrowly misses your <bung>. "CHO," it bellows.

Fumble Message:

The construct bellows "HOCHO ANSOM. ZEVEBEBUHO TAFU," as it first spins in place, then glides in ever-expanding circles, ignoring you completely.

Punchcard.gifImage:punchcard.gifEl Vibrato punchcard (115 holes)You acquire an item: El Vibrato punchcard (115 holes) (14.6% chance)*
Punchcard.gifImage:punchcard.gifEl Vibrato punchcard (142 holes)You acquire an item: El Vibrato punchcard (142 holes) (14.9% chance)*
You gain 100 <substat>.

Occurs at A Shimmering Portal.

Command Sequences

The construct aims one of its gun-like arms at the wall and blasts it with energy. The wall is unfazed.
The construct aims one of its gun-like arms at the floor and blasts it with energy. The floor is unfazed.
The construct aims one of its gun-like arms at its head and blasts it with energy, dealing 47 damage.
The construct aims one of its gun-like arms at you and blasts you with energy.
HPYou lose 48 hit points.

Notes

  • If an El Vibrato translator is equipped, the attack message changes to "INTRUDER DETECTED. INITIATING DEFENSIVE BEHAVIOR SEQUENCE".
  • The hit message "CHASOM TAFU CHOCHA ZAKBUBUCHA." translates to "OPTIMAL TARGET METRIC ESTABLISHED."
  • The miss message "HOCHO ANSOM. ZEVEBEBUHO TAFU" translates to "SYSTEM FAILURE. REACQUIRING TARGET".
  • The miss message "CHO" translates to "CRAP".

References

  • Your character's reaction to the construct is almost exactly how the character Twoflower, of the Discworld series, would react.
This page was last modified on 6 July 2008, at 11:19.
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