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La Novia Cadáver

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La Novia Cadáver
Location every 25-35 adventures on El Dia de Los Muertos Borrachos
Hitpoints Equal to player HP
Attack Scales with player stats
Defense Scales with player stats
Initiative  ?
Meat None
Element None
Physical None
Drops
red-headed corpse (below level 5), corpse on the beach (level 5 and above)
edit data
La Novia Cadáver You're fighting La Novia Cadáver

This is the legendary Novia Cadáver (literally, the "Corpse Bride"). Legend has it that her no-good boyfriend failed to show up on their wedding day, so she killed herself in a paroxysm of grief.

Actually, she downed seven or eight martinis, stripped off her wedding dress, and went for a drunken skinnydip in the whitewater rapids of Whitey's Grove. Still, it was a tragic end to a white wedding (though it was a nice day for it, all things considered).

Hit Message(s):

She smashes you with her bouquet. Looks like you're the next one to get married! Ouch! Argh! Ooh!

She stomps on your foot with a high-heeled shoe. Ugh! Ow! Oof!

She takes off her garter and flicks it at you like a rubber band. Aren't those things supposed to have bows on them, not razor blades? Argh! Ooh! Ouch!

She backhands you, leaving a bruise in the shape of an engagement ring. Ooh! Ouch! Ugh!

Critical Hit Message:

She leans in for a headbutt, and some kind of mustachioed worm crawls out of her right eye socket and bites you on the nose. It's pretty disturbing, and pretty painful. Argh! Ugh! Argh! Ouch!

Miss Message(s):

She tries to smash you with her bouquet, but you dodge.

She tries to hit you with her ring hand, but you handily dodge.

She tries to stomp your instep, but you step out.

She tries to garrotte you with her garter, but can't get her leg over your head.

Fumble Message:

She stomps toward you, but her left leg falls off. She looks embarrassed, and asks you to avert your eyes as she reattaches it to her hip socket.

Corpseshot.gifImage:corpseshot.gifred-headed corpseYou acquire an item: red-headed corpse
Corpsebeach.gifImage:corpsebeach.gifcorpse on the beachYou acquire an item: corpse on the beach
You gain some <substat>.

Occurs at random locations during the El Dia de Los Muertos Borrachos.

Notes

References

This page was last modified on 7 June 2008, at 17:51.
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